Garbage Gazette
Knowledge was the real treasure all along
Once at Ginger's, the crew bluffed their way inside by pretending to be the band.
They met with Captain Dunn, who did not have the necklace on hand, but who offered her help.
Before they could leave, an old face appeared in the crowd.
Watt, determined to get revenge, challenged Chuckles to a duel.
The two fought, and with the help of his friends, managed to beat the bourgeoisie and leave him in pain.
The crew went to the warehouse where the necklace was being held.
With agility, strength, and luck, Chuckles and Squish made their way upstairs.
The captain took a less direct approach, luring out the two guards, blasting them with fire, and then running inside.
And rocks.
I think what you did was you threw rocks at a barrel, and the barrel exploded.
Sounds like something I would do.
A battle commenced between the Garbage Boys and the Ministry.
Eventually, they were able to enter the office where the treasure was being held.
Inside, they found the Magufin gold, a map, leading to the captain's ship.
Now the crew must decide their next steps.
Can the captain find his ship?
Do they tempt the void sea and search out the treasure?
Will Baz even allow them to leave the city?
I guess we'll find out, won't we?
He better.
Hopefully not.
I don't really want to find out.
I just want to live in peace.
I never hurt nobody.
I mean, you did hurt a lot of people.
You hurt a man named Watt, specifically.
And he had a pretty cool glove when you did it.
No.
You blew him up.
I didn't blow him up.
That was exaggerated.
Yeah, but the exaggeration is you blew him up.
I mean, tomato, tomato, I would say.
But now what is this picture on the wall?
This is some kind of ghost?
Wasn't it the fire demon?
That was the fire demon you had access to.
Now, you did let him go in the warehouse.
And as far as I'm aware, you did not summon him back.
So he is currently ready to be.
In other news, just to round out everything that happened.
So you guys got some money.
You found quite a bit of gold in that treasure.
So you now have six coin on you.
Divided amongst the three of us or six each?
You have six altogether.
So like as a group, you have six.
Divided between the three of you.
So like however you want to split it up, you can.
You currently have two spaces for coin in your treasury, in your fort.
So I don't know.
However you guys want to split that up.
I've got to start spending some coin.
I mean, I'll take two coin.
We got six from that adventure?
Yeah, because there was also gold in that treasure chest.
Oh.
We just stuffed our pockets full of gold and ran out.
Yeah.
So you have the equivalent of six coin, which is a pretty good haul.
Like that's really decent.
That's really, really good.
Well, should we split it up?
I don't know.
Should we buy something?
I'm going to the stash because I don't have any more space.
Well, we only have two in the stash, right?
Yeah.
You only have two spots available.
So you have two currently in there.
You can put two more coin in.
I thought the stash seems like it has a lot more than just two in the pop-out sheet.
Where?
On the character sheet, there's like...
No, on just the individual character.
There's like a bunch.
There's the stash.
But I don't know what that...
Is that supposed to be your stash?
Are you talking about in your own stash?
Is that my own stash?
Yeah.
So the way the stash works is that...
So you can have four coin on hand.
And then the rest goes into your stash.
And then you can take some out.
The stash is like not easily accessible to you.
Within the group itself, though.
Like you guys as a group have two coins that you have stashed away.
So you can hold two more.
And then if you want.
Or individually, you guys can hold more.
So like Captain, you have five coin available total.
Squish has got eight.
Holy crap.
I only have two.
I bought stuff.
Chuckles has two.
And then you have another two like in reserve.
Should we just add to the stash?
I think we should buy something for the garbage.
Don't we need a navigation system?
I think you're working on that.
I thought that was the Tinker.
You and the Tinker were working on it together.
You were creating essentially sales.
I have a name.
Sorry.
You and Charles Xander were working on it.
You were making some sort of navigational system.
I think you had settled on like sales and like a steering mechanism.
Yeah, that sounds right.
Yeah.
So that's like a project that you're working on.
And you have three out of four steps done.
So let's do more.
Do more steps.
Give me three steps.
Your favorite song.
Sorry.
Okay.
So one thing.
That'll be your long-term project, Captain, will be to finish navigation.
But I'm also, I don't want to finish navigation.
I want it to be known because I want to use the gar barge to get to my ship.
It's not a surprise.
So do you want to use the rest of your coins just to do that?
To finish it?
I mean, do I have to use all five of the coins?
Or are you going to roll for it?
So normally for the projects, you roll for it and it's something you work towards.
But I guess if you just want to pay for it, you could.
It's up to you.
What do you think?
No, it's up to you.
It's up to you three.
What do you guys think?
I mean, if he pays for it, he still gets his two downtime activities?
Or if we pay for it?
Yeah.
It's basically whether we're going to pay for it in coins or pay for it in downtime.
I mean, I guess I'll just do it in downtime because I don't know.
I don't know.
I'm not sure because I don't want to rush the game or nothing like that.
You know what I'm saying?
No.
Okay.
So that's what you'll do during downtime is you'll finish the navigation.
Just how do you want this money spent?
How do you want it split up?
I got six coin burning a hole in my pocket and I want to give it to you guys.
Let's just do it two apiece then.
Yeah, I think we should just do two apiece.
Okay.
But still, we really ought to buy stuff, I think, is kind of, I mean, it doesn't really do us any good just holding on to it.
I don't know about everyone else.
I guess I don't, I'm not really sure what we can buy.
I guess we're getting a navigation for, or I mean, we're going to do the boat thing.
We don't use items a lot, really.
Like, I don't really want a gun.
Or, you know, like that.
I don't want a gun.
You are working, you...
I'm working on one, yeah.
You are working on one, yeah.
Okay.
Well, then everybody just toss two coins, whether it's in your stash or just your coin holding.
Whichever.
All right.
I'll just hold it on.
Okay.
Go ahead.
Good?
Yep.
Okay.
And then you all earned...
Oops, sorry.
You all earned five XP for that last mission.
Hell yeah.
I can read the specifics for you, if you want.
Yes.
Chuckles, you had one for Tinker, one for Wreck, one for an Epic Nut Punch, one for a Basket Hide, and one for Prowl.
Squish, you had one Hunt, one Sway, another Sway, one...
I think this says Firehose.
No, that can't be right.
What did I do with the Firehose?
No, that's not right.
One Hunt, one Tinker, and another Hunt.
I'm not sure what this says.
I Tinkered something?
Yes.
Weird.
Maybe it was the Firehose.
And then, Captain, you had one Command, one Wreck, one Finesse, one Wreck, and one Distraction.
The Rock Distraction.
Wait, didn't we take something last time?
Yeah.
Treasure.
My Treasure Map.
No.
I thought...
Hmm.
What do you mean, did we take something?
I thought there was, like, a...
We get an additional XP if we did something.
That might be one of your skills.
You get an extra point if you got payback against someone that you harmed.
Oh, revenge.
Yeah.
Okay.
If you got revenge.
Maybe that's what the Firehose is.
Maybe.
I don't think you got revenge on anyone.
I mean, Juggles, I guess, technically did, but it's not revenge on...
Because they hurt somebody that he loved.
Except your pride, I suppose.
I mean, Juggles kind of took revenge on Watt.
I'm not sure...
But Watt never actually, like, threatened him.
Yeah, I don't really...
I don't really...
I'm not really mad at Watt, like...
Yeah, but you've got a rivalry that will match the ages.
Yeah.
I mean, you've turned this nice man who invited us to his nice house to have a nice party...
You've turned him into a monster.
Well, he didn't invite you.
You guys definitely did sneak in.
That's not how I remember it.
Of course it's not.
But it's true.
That's not how...
That's subjective.
I think we got in the back with cigarettes and a long trench coat.
Sounds about right.
But he let us in, so there.
Well, go ahead and everyone can give themselves 5 XP.
It's a reminder that's by your abilities.
All right.
I filled it up all the way.
Nice.
You can pick another ability.
All right.
Tinker.
Am I still stressed and harmed?
Yes.
Yes, your XP does not change that.
But if you like, you can do some things to reduce your stress.
You can also go get some healing done.
I've got...
It says here I've concussed.
I've got bruised ribs, stress from a failed jump, mental shock, and fall damage.
Wow.
That was a real rough one for you.
How can I have mental shock and concussed?
You're shocked by how concussed you are.
That's right.
So you're also going to heal this downtime.
Is that on the plant docket?
Sounds like it.
Healing and trying to find a way to my ship.
Okay.
Oh, guys, I hope you're not tired of me saying how much I want to find my ship.
I am.
I'm already tired of you.
You said you...
You've already said it a dozen times.
You said it three times.
Well...
I want to find my ship.
Okay.
Other things.
As a team, you guys had an additional six rep.
No.
I'm sorry.
Five rep added to your list.
Exactly.
You guys made...
Yeah.
Reputation's good.
It's like people...
You're like local heroes.
People really like you.
Aw.
In less good news, your wanted level also went up.
You attacked a ministry operation.
You didn't blow anything up, allegedly.
Allegedly.
You didn't blow anything up this time.
No.
No, we blew up the warehouse.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, the warehouse definitely caught on fire.
I lost two spirits.
We blew it up with that...
Yeah, that Boom Boom guy.
We blew the shit.
We blew up that warehouse.
Yeah, Kaboom.
Can I call him back?
Who's the one I can call back?
The fire guy or the Boom Boom guy?
Hotman.
So you have your own personal...
Hotman is your own personal demon that you can call to your aid when you desire.
And he can throw fireballs.
Okay.
Yes.
But we blew up that warehouse.
Allegedly.
Yes, you did.
Allegedly.
And then your XP also increased.
So that's a little bit higher.
Oh, as a group.
As a group, yep.
Does that mean we could do cool tricks together?
Like the Jesse Jackson tumblers?
Not quite.
You're one away from leveling up as a group.
Okay.
I think that's everything.
Payoff, your team, your rep.
Okay.
Yeah.
So that's all the points to give out.
Does that mean...
Oh, so...
Chuck, you said you had a new ability.
Did you pick one?
Oh, yeah.
I added one to my rec.
Because I just feel like I'm a madman.
You're very...
I like your build.
You're very tinker-minded, rec-minded, and have no people skills.
Don't forget.
Nor attune.
Nor any attunement.
See?
Squish.
Squish is surprisingly, I think, out of...
Well...
No, I guess the captain has a little bit more resolve people skills.
Oh.
I just found on my sheet there's a thing called demolition tools.
Can I buy a shitload of that?
Sure.
How do I...
How?
Is that under, like, your load?
Yeah.
Do you have to buy those?
I don't think so.
I think you just take...
You just say you have them with you.
Well, I have them with me.
Okay.
You just earn a score, not now.
All the time.
Wait, do you have them on you now?
Yes.
That's not good for the garbarge.
Uh, it's not not good for the garbarge.
It's not like it's made out of wood.
You're a madman who likes to blow things up.
Only things that cross me.
And also random things I've been visiting for the first time.
And boats and houses.
Probably a school, allegedly.
No, that wasn't me.
Oh, yeah.
We did get that guy.
Okay.
Yeah, so you guys, uh, after a successful and rousing night out, blowing up nuts, blowing up warehouses, finding treasure, finding friends, uh, you stagger back into the garbarge, and they're waiting for you, uh, is Tawny and Dee Dee.
Uh, they've been back.
Uh, Tawny is looking a little bit better from, uh, your attempt to assassinate him.
Uh, or just kill him, I guess.
There's no assassination involved.
Oh.
Um, and, uh, he's sitting there.
He's kind of morose looking.
He's a little, you know, he's not happy to be there, but he's had a few hours to think about it, and he's resigned himself to being, uh, on your crew.
Well, I wouldn't, I wouldn't say that, uh, I, I will kill you before it comes to that.
Yeah.
I've been thinking, he says, uh, as you guys go in, and he goes, I, I've been thinking a lot about my life and where I went wrong and how I ended up here with a monkey.
And, uh.
He's an ape.
Well, either way, uh, I don't think being with Baz has done me any favors, so.
I'm in, I'm in for the long haul.
Oh, man.
Also, he's trying to kill me.
Yeah, he definitely did.
So.
So you want to join the crew?
I guess, I mean, I, you don't really seem to have any muscle with you.
I guess I, I think I could be of help here.
Good.
You can start paying dues immediately.
Excuse me?
What'd you say, Brandon?
Sorry.
You can start paying dues immediately.
Also, you're a junior member, not an official full, you don't have voting rights, I guess is what I'm saying.
Yeah, you still have a few weeks of hazing to go through.
Yes, and you are, count only as three-fifths of a person.
Right.
You're basically our intern.
Well, I mean, I was basically Baz's intern, so I guess nothing's really changed.
Man, you are easy to please.
Well, you know, it's not, it's not a lot, but it's our life, you know?
I don't know.
Speaking of.
You sound depressed.
Well, my night started with my boss, my old boss, yelling at me and telling me I had to go jump you.
And then I proceeded to get my ass kicked.
And then I came here, and this place is both incredibly smelly and filthy.
And captivating.
And I don't know if it's just the monkey, or if it's everything, or if it's these piles of onions I found in this corner.
So why don't you just clean it up, newbie?
I guess.
I guess I could.
Yeah, quick complaint.
But what about you?
What are you guys doing?
Well, I was just thinking maybe we ought to try to cheer you up.
I mean, I'm always looking for an excuse to drink.
You need an excuse?
Yes.
All right.
Let's get the shoes.
Wait, we don't have to bring our own shoes, do we?
Ideally, no.
But you should probably wear the shoes you want to drink out of, just in case.
No, no, no, no.
Let's go to the Toad.
He has the shoes I like.
The Toad?
The Toad.
The Toad!
You guys walk into the Toad, and Rigby's there, and he goes,
Oh, it's been a long time!
Where have you guys been?
I saw you took off from above the, above the, above my roof.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
We're independent now.
And, uh, who's this grumpy looking bastard?
Hey, didn't this guy come in here before?
Wasn't he razzing you?
Yeah.
We're friends.
This is our new intern named Tony.
It's Tony.
He's a prison bitch.
What?
I have been, I have been in prison.
You were there.
You guys were there.
Remember?
We've all been in prison.
Except, technically, I guess, I guess Squish wasn't.
He was, he was working there.
I've been in, in prison.
Yeah.
In prison.
Well, I mean, I was dressed up like a guard, too.
Oh, wasn't that fun?
No.
I'm pretty sure you, like, you threatened us then.
I, I definitely, definitely tried to frame you.
Now, now, now, if this, if this internship is going to work, we're going to have to let bygones
be bygones.
Now, Toad, get this man your largest shoe and fill it with your cheapest liquor.
Uh, Toad reaches down behind the counter and you see he pulls out basically like a shoe
rack.
Um, and it's just been a collection of shoes that people have, you know, because people
come to the bar, they drink, they leave, they lose their shoes.
Uh, it's like a bowling alley.
It's like a bowling alley.
Sets it on the table and starts, starts picking different shoes and pours you all a, pours
you all a drink and, and hands it over.
I'm not really sure where the shoe thing started.
Um, but I guess it's just part of the lore now.
Also, that's not his name.
His name is not Toad.
No, but I.
No, it's Trigney.
Well, yeah, but his last name is Toad.
No, the, the, the Toad, the Toad part.
Well, well, that's a funny story.
Well, uh, anyway, have you ever seen a Toad that's been stepped on?
Uh, no.
A downtrodden Toad?
Well.
Ah!
It's pretty flat.
And, uh, they used to say to me, they said, oh, look at that man who's got a face like
a stepped on Toad.
Wow.
And you named your business after that, huh?
How?
Well, it was memorable.
It was very ribbiting.
Oh, my head hurts.
I pass out.
Oh, that's right.
Oh.
You're, kind of nudges you, Captain, with his foot and he goes, oh, your friend doesn't
look too good.
Should I, uh, should I get my sister?
She still owes you guys some free healing.
No.
He's only a little concussed and mentally shocked.
Oh, I thought you were talking about something else.
I, uh, I want to...
Oh, no, no.
You've seen her.
She's the one with the, well, her eyes don't look quite right.
Oh, yeah.
She's hideous.
Yeah.
Well, you know, she's got no teeth either, so...
I've got my own healer I want to see.
All right.
Well, do you want a drink?
Nope.
And I get up and run out.
Whoa.
Completely baffling.
I look at Juggles and go, did he...
He just said no to a drink?
Yeah, I think he's missing...
He's got some brain damage.
I think we're...
I think we should be more worried about that than Tawny's depression.
I'm not interested.
In which one?
Uh, any of it, really.
So...
Uh, I'm gonna, you know...
Hang out.
Okay.
Captain, uh, do you want to enlighten us where you've run off to?
Uh, let me guess.
He's going to look for his ship.
I know.
I have a healer that I ran into right when I first got into town.
I want to go to her place.
Okay.
All right.
Or his place.
Yeah, his place.
Um...
I'm sorry.
Whoa!
That's not right.
Do you guys see that?
Yeah, you might have to activate the scene.
Okay.
No, good.
You shouldn't see that.
Okay, we don't see it.
Good.
Very good.
Continue.
Where are you meeting this person?
Uh, it's down the street a little wise, near the, uh, near the, uh, shipyard.
Like, not too far away from, like, the, where, where, where I washed up.
When I first came to Duskball.
And it's like, uh, in an alley.
And it's down into, and it's down a little basement.
It's not too far from here, I don't think.
I don't know.
I don't know the map very well.
Both in character and out of character.
Oh, there, there is no map.
It's gone.
Okay, so you're in this little back alley, Captain, and you stumble in.
Yeah, and it's, like, down the stairs, and it's, like, this, like, weird, like, uh, it's,
like, do you ever see the Batman movie where Joker gets his face worked on?
It's kind of, like, down there.
Have you ever seen that movie, Tiger?
Have you seen the Batman movie?
You know, that one with Michael Keaton?
No.
Andy, have you seen that Batman movie?
I don't even know what a Batman is.
Okay, so, yeah, you go down this, uh,
Sorry, that was mean.
Uh, you go down this little rickety staircase,
and you get into this dusty little, little hole in the wall.
And I'm banging on the door, and, uh, you know,
making, like, kind of bang, bang, bang, bang, you know?
Okay, a woman, uh, a woman comes out to the door
and kind of slides open the door a little bit,
and she glares at you, and she goes,
What do you want?
I take off my, my eye patch and say,
It's me!
The man you saved when I first got here!
I need help!
And I fall over.
The, uh, this woman, uh, looks through the peephole
and, like, looks at you.
And then, uh, backs away a minute.
She opens the door, and the door is, like, comically large.
You know?
She opens just a tiny little bit of it.
And, uh, takes you by your boots and, and drags you in.
She's a, a middle, older, middle-aged woman.
Kind of, you know, dumpy.
But, you know, not, not threatening in any way.
Just kind of a lower class lady.
And she, she brings you inside, Captain.
Uh, are you gonna roll to be healed?
Yeah.
Okay.
Now, we do get plus one to healing, right?
Yes.
You do get plus one.
And I'm just trying to remember if it's your highest attribute.
Because I always forget.
It's not like we've done this 15 times.
Right.
These two are always getting hurt.
Yeah.
I keep falling.
I'm not hurt, actually.
Yeah, but you've been hurt before.
Okay.
I've never had to been healed.
Wow, I'm not sure why you have to keep bringing that up.
I'm tough as nails.
You're a demon woman.
Yeah, you're really a big, fat jerk, too.
Look who's talking.
I haven't done anything to hurt anyone.
We've been over this.
Okay.
Uh, so, for healing, uh, looks like you just roll one.
But since you guys get a plus one for your healing, you can roll two.
All right.
So, just roll, what did I roll?
Uh.
Just, just two die.
Two die.
Okay.
Did not roll.
Two die.
You only rolled one.
I just wanted to do that.
Sorry, I'll do it again.
The result is bad.
Oh, my God.
Oh.
Six.
Uh, so that's, uh, that's a critical.
You get five segments of healing.
So, the way that's going to work, Brandon,
Uh-huh.
is you're going to give yourself three, uh, on this circle.
Three in the circle.
What circle?
And then you can reduce, uh, one of your harms.
So, if it's a level one, it disappears.
Uh, if it's level two, it would go down to level one.
But since you have no more space, you actually just have to get rid of one of the level ones.
So, one of the fall damage or the stress from failed jump?
Yeah.
If I get rid of the stress from failed jump, does that get rid of my stress, too?
Or is that just an injury?
That's just an injury.
I don't know how that happened.
Were you supposed to take stress and you gave yourself stress from a failed jump instead?
Maybe.
Did you write that down as your harm?
Maybe.
Sounds like something else.
All right.
I'm going to get rid of fall damage.
All right.
I'm still concussed, though.
How do I get rid of the concussion?
That's the...
Uh, you would have to heal your...
You could...
So, you could either use another downtime activity to pay for it, or you can use some of your money and pay for it.
I'm going to use some of my money and pay for it from this lady.
Okay.
Uh, so, uh, you wake up from your, uh, from your, uh, passing out, and the lady's, like, looking over at you, and she's kind of glaring at you, and she's, like, looking in your eyes, and she's, like, you still don't seem right, but only anyone gets one free healing.
All right.
I need to look at my stash, and I just pull out whatever coin I have, and it's kind of, like, I'm still kind of very concussed, so I'm still kind of out of it.
Um, how much is it going to cost to heal?
Well, she's not a very, uh, fancy place, so we're going to say it's going to be, uh, two coin.
One for the healing and one to keep quiet.
Okay.
Okay, so same thing, roll two again, and then you take your highest.
All right, uh, hold on a minute.
Sorry, I was writing it down.
Okay.
So, uh, that's, uh, two segments.
Oh, yeah, you gave yourself the extra ones, right?
Yeah, you did.
Okay.
So what do I do?
Okay, so you had one before.
You added five.
Uh-huh.
So that left you with two more segments.
So now you get an additional two.
Okay, so what do I, what do I do?
On your circle, you see it?
Yeah.
You give yourself two more segments.
It's now full.
Yeah, so you can now lower one more, uh, one more, one level of stress.
Or erase your last one.
One level of drop-down stress?
Yeah.
Okay.
Then what about the concussion?
So you can, uh, either erase stress from failed jump, you can, uh, lower bruised ribs,
or you can lower mental shock.
Although you spelled it mental shock, so that's fun.
I can't lower my stress.
How do you do that?
Not your stress.
Your, your, your harm.
All right.
Um.
Stress, you gotta indulge your voice, which I think is reason to read in books.
All right, so dropping down my bruised ribs, I guess.
I'm still, I'm still concussed.
Yes.
Oh my God.
But you are overall doing better, and, uh, yeah.
All right.
Okay?
Mm-hmm.
So, uh, the old lady kind of gives you this, uh, strange kind of milky tea, and you drink
it, and you start to feel better, and she looks at you, and she goes, that was months ago that
I pulled you out of the ocean.
What are you doing?
Githa!
Lady Githa!
I think I found it.
I think I found my ship.
Oh.
That thing that, uh, you were raving about when I picked you up out of the ocean?
The Kahuna wave.
The finest vessel in the sea.
She kind of makes a face, like, sounds like a pizza topping, something you'd put on with
pineapple.
Sounds delicious.
Burn!
You can call it any kind of topping you want.
I call it perfection on waves.
And I finally found it.
I found a map back to it.
And what's more, Githa, what's more?
I remember.
I remember everything.
And, uh.
Well.
Yeah, I get all excited, and, uh.
I'm like, how am I, how am I looking?
Am I looking okay?
How's my frock?
Can it cover these ribs?
Because my ribs are still about, I'd say about level one bruised.
Well, to be honest, you smell the same.
So, I guess things haven't gone poorly for you.
Burn!
I did just mix your medicine.
I like this lady.
I did just mix your medicine with my whiskey, so.
Well, uh.
I'm glad you're doing better.
And you see her.
She's kind of, like, picking up her stuff.
And, like.
She kind of is a little weirded out by you.
Uh.
But, uh.
She's like, so, uh.
So, what's next?
What do you.
You found your ship.
You remembered everything.
What.
What's next?
Find my ship.
Take my lads with me.
And bring in a new life.
On the sea.
Or near the port of Duskval.
I'm not sure yet.
We'll find out when we get out there.
The ship's so fine.
What?
When you point.
You point away from, uh.
From the dock.
Which is clearly visible through the window.
Yeah.
I'm pointing.
I'm pointing Don's, uh.
Like, down towards the city.
Well.
I wish you all the best in that.
But, um.
Just gotta get away from this.
Baz, fella.
Yeah.
Well.
Not that I really am, uh.
Particularly interested.
But since you're sitting in my living room.
Uh.
Do you know how to.
Sail?
I ask because.
When I found you.
You did in fact look like.
You were drowned.
Almost drowned.
And, um.
I don't know.
Uh.
You don't take me as the sailing type.
Yeah.
I was viciously.
Mutiny upon.
I was betrayed.
And thrown off my ship.
And yes.
Is that you looking towards the dock again?
I'm not a good swimmer.
Yeah.
I'm like looking.
Trying to look out the window.
But it's like a basement window.
Yeah.
You know.
And when I get my ship back.
And when I get with my new crew.
My new family.
We're gonna have so many adventures.
Treasures.
Booty.
Onions probably for some reason.
And all the finest.
Finest.
Uh.
Culinary food you can imagine.
It's gonna be great.
Well.
That sounds just lovely.
But, um.
Are you finished?
Are you.
Can you walk?
Yes.
I'm finished.
Thank you.
I'm all ready to go.
How are you?
I didn't even ask.
You don't need to know.
And she just shoos you back out.
Okay.
All right.
Are you sure you want.
Don't want to nip with me?
No.
She shuts the door.
All right.
Finest lady I've ever met.
I turn and walk away.
What a woman.
Okay.
Well.
Captain.
Uh.
Captain disappears back into the.
To the duskfall fog.
Uh.
Back at the downtrodden toad.
Squish.
Chuckles.
How are you doing?
What are you doing?
Well.
I'm just trying to enjoy my holy water.
I.
Okay.
I assume we're trying to bond.
Or I mean.
I think we're trying to bond.
We've been drinking.
Uh.
I'm not really sure how it's going though.
Um.
So.
Tony.
Let's see.
Let's see how it's drinking.
Let's see how it's going.
Let's see how it's drinking.
Let's drink it bud.
Not well.
Tony's just sitting there with his like.
Head between his arms.
Hands.
And he's just like.
I've made so many bad choices.
You know.
You just gotta.
You just gotta love yourself man.
You just gotta.
Uh.
Can I buy him drugs?
Yeah.
Sure.
All right.
What?
Toad.
Mr. Toad.
You got drugs.
This seems like a place that has drugs.
Drugs?
Oh.
There's plenty of drugs here.
No.
Drugs.
Listen.
And he gets real serious for a second.
And he's like.
You're not gonna buy drugs in here.
And you're not gonna bring them in here.
I don't even care if you bring them in here.
But keep your damn mouth shut.
There's no drugs in here.
But if you do want some.
You gotta go around back.
Just start asking around.
But don't do it in my store.
This is a good family establishment.
I'm trying to build a business here.
And he points.
And there's like small children.
Just kind of like hanging around the bar.
Why would they be selling?
Oh.
I hear you.
Wink.
I say out loud.
I said that part out loud too.
And I'm gonna go out towards the alley.
I'm gonna stumble out.
And I say.
Squish.
I know what this party needs.
And I stumble outside.
If you say onions.
I'm gonna be mad.
No.
I don't think they sell onions in the alley.
I'm gonna be so mad.
Wait.
Do they?
God.
I don't.
I don't know.
All right.
Well.
We'll see.
You like onions.
You eat cat food.
You're.
You're an enigma.
You're making me hungry.
All right.
Well.
See you later.
And I stumble.
I stumble out the front door.
And you see me walk in one direction.
And then see me turn around and walk the other direction.
You.
As you stumble out of the alley.
You are now.
Well.
Out of the restaurant.
You're in the alley.
And.
People are just kind of keeping an eye on you.
And watching you.
Tawny follows.
Because he's just.
He doesn't really know what else to do at this point.
Yeah.
And you stumble down the street together.
Oh.
Yeah.
You didn't see you there.
Boy.
You're a big fella.
Aren't you?
Yeah.
And he really is.
He like.
Has no neck.
And he's just like.
Walking.
But he's also like.
Pathetically drunk.
And kind of like.
Just crying at this point.
And he's just like.
It's just.
I don't know where everything went wrong.
I was supposed to go to school.
I was supposed to be a plumber.
But there's no indoor plumbing yet.
In this world.
What are you going to do with a plumber?
That is a real terrible luck of the draw.
You know where the plumber is before indoor plumbing?
It's the guy who cleans the outhouse.
Oh.
We just go in the hole.
It's a rather big hole.
So you can't miss it.
However.
You know what?
I know it'll cheer you up.
And.
I don't know.
Do I have any sort of.
Background in.
You know.
The underbelly.
You know that prostitute.
Well.
You just go and talk to her.
Yeah.
But you know.
The brothel.
I mean.
I don't know.
Tell me.
Do you have any experience in the underground?
No.
But I do now.
Okay.
There's a.
I have a list here.
Of people that I may know.
One of them is Veldrin.
The psychonaut.
But I can't go to her.
Because that's too close to my vest.
But I will go to Stasia.
An apothecary.
Which I believe.
Is a.
Drug.
Maker.
So as you stumble down.
This alley.
You come across the shop.
That seems a bit cleaner.
Than the others.
It's a little bit nicer.
And as you walk in.
There's a very tall woman in there.
She has very long.
Brown hair.
And she's just.
Kind of like a jewelry counter.
Person.
If you ever see those.
You know.
Where they're.
They're very nice.
They're very posh.
But they're not friendly.
In the slightest.
And she's like.
She kind of just cracks a smile.
And she goes.
Is there anything I can help you find today?
Oh.
Yeah.
Hello.
I'm.
I'm Charles Zander.
And.
Uh.
I'm.
Sober.
And here is my sober.
Friend.
Tawny.
And.
Uh.
And.
Uh.
She's.
She has a smile.
On her face.
But when she says that your name is Charles Zander.
It kind of just like.
Falters.
Ever so slightly.
And she's like.
Oh.
Wow.
It's nice to meet you.
And your.
Sober friend.
Is there any particular.
Um.
Curative.
Or.
Undulates.
Or.
Preventatives.
That you're thinking about.
Uh.
And.
She look at the walls.
And.
Unlike Skylock's place.
Which is very messy.
And organic.
This is very clean.
Very tidy.
Everything's in like.
Glass.
Label.
Or glass jars.
And labeled nicely.
With a little script.
It's very clean.
And very organized.
In there.
Well.
I've just come into some money.
And.
Well.
You see.
My friend's depressed.
So.
We need.
Um.
Some.
Some go-go fun.
In the.
To lack of a better term.
Drugs.
You sound like.
Somebody who's never had drugs.
Asking for drugs.
Yeah.
She goes.
Sir.
I.
I don't know.
What kind of establishment.
You.
You think this is.
But as you see.
We just sell.
Herbs.
Curatives.
Additives.
Preventatives.
Um.
Not any.
Addictives.
If you understand.
My meaning.
I see.
So.
Yes.
We need some.
Curative.
Of.
The real bummer.
That this guy is.
So.
What do you have.
To cure that?
Are you asking.
For antidepressants.
Or.
Hardcore drugs.
I can't tell.
Whatever she's got.
For a reasonable.
Price.
She sighs.
And.
Uh.
She doesn't say anything.
But she reaches out her hand.
And she kind of.
Just taps on the.
On the desk.
What's that supposed to be?
Just a symbol.
Do you want me to look in that.
In that glass.
Or in that.
Uh.
Desk.
Or what?
I.
What.
What are we.
What are we doing here?
Let's pretend like.
I've never done this before.
I can tell.
So.
Huh?
Usually.
People.
Patients.
We have a.
Curative.
Okay.
But it is a.
Pay up front.
Sort of thing.
And she.
Taps the.
The table.
Again.
Well.
I.
Assume.
We weren't going to pay.
After we took it.
Then you'd have no leverage.
It's strange.
How.
You say that.
And yet.
There is no money.
On this table.
Wait.
So you want me to put money.
On the table.
Why.
Did you just.
Say that.
Sir.
If you could.
Uh.
And she's like.
Looking around.
Just.
Keep your voice down.
And.
Normally.
What you do.
Is you put.
Two coin.
On the table.
And.
Then.
I will.
Lead you.
To a private.
Exam room.
And.
Uh.
We can take a look.
At your friend.
And see what's wrong.
With him.
I promise.
I'm not a cop.
And I put.
I put two coins.
On the table.
She puts her hand.
Over it.
And just kind of.
Slides it.
Towards her.
And just sticks it.
In her.
print pocket and she goes um that's reassuring um if you'd like to come with me and uh she kind
of nods towards this back door and opens it and as soon as you walk in it's like a completely
different environment it's dark it's dingy you can kind of just hear some smells you hear some music
and you walk around this small corridor until you get into the back which is basically an open
den um there are beds on the and cots um everywhere there's like pieces of uh fabric dividing the beds
but it's all open uh there are people laying on the beds they're in various states of um undress
consciousness no um some people are are laying out and they're sleeping or they look like they're
passed out other people are like talking and laughing with each other some are like laying
in bed and kind of just giggling to themselves uh but you can tell that everybody here has been
smoking something um and you can because you can smell this kind of like heavy tobacco we smell
in the air uh and uh she leads you over to a pair of empty cots and she puts her hands out and she
she explains she's like well uh for for what you've bought you can have an hour in here and uh this is
yours and she hands you a small pot of kind of sticky brown leaves and she goes um after today uh when
you take this uh promise you won't come back because uh that was quite a scene oh dear i feel like i upset
you uh well but i'm just going to uh you know try and cheer up my friend here uh and so we are going to
but he says you smoke it huh
yes you um you know let me um let me find someone to help you i think you need a little assistance and
a guide so to speak yeah yeah some sort of guide and uh she calls to somebody else and this little
old man comes like up scuttling up to you and he's kind of like old and decrepit and can't quite see
very well and he he takes the uh leafy substance for you and he kind of like you sees him kind of
messing around within with some some bowls and stuff there and he sets out in front of the two of you
a little bowl with a little brown substance in it and uh he goes are you ready sirs
uh well i'm i'm ready we you ready tawny i feel like this is the this is really gonna set our lives
straight especially yours tawny's got like red eyes and he's just like looking up and he just sniffs
uh the little guy in front of you says okay on count of three i light and you sniff already
uh okay and uh i grab i i grab a pinkies with uh tawny and i say all right let's go
uh so uh the guy pulls out his little matchbooks he strikes his match he lights yours he lights the
other one he goes one two three and he takes your head and essentially puts them down into the to the
little bowls kind of like he's giving you like a wet like a not a wet willy you know when you dunk
someone's head in the toilet what do they call those flushies swirly swirly yeah yeah just just
picks your head right into the bowl
whoa i assume it's happening to me it's a rush of euphoria i imagine yeah yeah i don't know what
that feels like you inhale and everything gets a little fuzzy everything gets a little bit lighter
everything feels a little bit nicer wow this is great why didn't we do this sooner
because uh as you guys smoke you start to cough your eyes start to burn a little bit uh and uh even
though you're enjoying yourself uh we're gonna do a uh a roll for both you and for for tawny to see how
this affects you and see if you're gonna do better so we're gonna do simple uh
best of you know odds and evens you know if it's uh over if it's odds you do great if it's evens
you don't do so great ready all right
hey you do good all right but one good
chuckle's uh no he's gonna roll his own oh boy oh i hope he freaks out
oh no and he breaks me in half oh yeah he does pretty good
all right he does pretty good so he starts to feel better and you're feeling okay too
all right
all right uh as the as the mood kind of gets better some uh some
musicians are in the corner they start playing some music tawny's like starting to lighten up a little
bit and uh he's staring at you chuckles and you go we'll have kind of this dumb grin on your face and you're like well
chuckles how did how do you do it
how do i do what
how do you live
oh i just never stop i just keep going and never look back and never really think about what i'm doing
an object in motion stays in motion oh my god you're so profound
oh it's brilliant but like have you ever just stopped
what no you never stop i mean sometimes you need to go to sleep
uh so i guess you stop then but really no just
just do just go with the flow man just
just do whatever
you know is going around
just just do that
all right chuckles i don't i i
you can you don't have to answer this but uh i gotta know man
like no i am not gay
well okay
sorry i was getting a vibe
okay uh i'm not gay either i definitely not gay he says
well i'm glad we got that out of the way
yeah that'd be really awkward
not that there's anything wrong with that
no no i'm sure it's really really fun
just not for me
i wouldn't know never done it
uh but the question i was asking since we're on the gay subject is uh what's with the nut punching man
who told you about that
i went
i witnessed it myself
you were there you saw that
no
how many times has that happened man i heard
well uh
everyone's heard
yeah and
you know what i'm
it's
just something that i've done
i'm a small
small man both literally and figuratively
and uh it makes me feel powerful
um you know you're a big man i always wish i could be a big man
uh but i'm not
a big man
and you know i don't
really
you know
i'm not imposing
but you know when i punch someone
down south
they
they feel my power
and uh
it's
quite
addicting
i've been trying to stop
and have more honor
but it turns out i'm just not a very honorable person
but
i mean that's like such a low blow man
i mean honor aside
i mean has
has anyone punched you in the nuts before man
um no
actually
now that you mention it
you're not gonna
you're not gonna hit me are you
i mean
i feel like it's
you know like
you gotta know what you're going through right
oh like when you bite a kid
that's been biting too many other kids
yeah i mean
that's sick
you're sick
you're a sick man
biting children
i mean i guess
i i mean i did
i i did
grow up
rough you know
i am a big guy
but it's not so easy being a big guy
you know
because you're a big guy
and everyone thinks
oh he's a big guy
he can do
big man things
he can
beat people up
with no issue
but nobody thinks
that the big man
has big emotions
you have big emotions
is that why you've been crying
this entire time
i'm crying now
and he's still got tears on his face
oh
uh
don't
don't cry
if you're crying
that means you're
you've stopped
and you're looking backwards
what did i say
never stop
don't stop
but
but what are you
what are you running from
well
just everything
i feel like if i stop
everything will catch up with me
but if i keep moving
it'll never catch up
and i will just keep on going
just
well
that's just how it is
well
here's to you man
and he picks up uh
he picks up his little drug jar
and he
cheers it
with you
hey
and then we take a big old sniff
take a big old sniff
wow
i love this stuff
we should do this every day
oh no
you definitely don't want to do that
that guy
that we saw earlier
yeah
yeah i know him
he's only like
24 man
this stuff rots your brain
holy shit
how old am i
i don't
that's a good question
we've been asking ourselves
that the entire time
i
i'm a
i'm a rough
18 man
you are a
big 18
you're
big for your size
oh
i'm big for a lot
yeah
uh
well
i appreciate you doing this
i i
i do feel better
and
i feel kind of bad
because i i think there should be something you should know
are you gay
no
i mean
but if i was
that wouldn't be what i'm
listen
okay
baz isn't gonna let you leave the city
baz who
my
my boss
your former boss
listen
to remember things
requires me to stop
and look backwards
and i'm always looking forwards
listen
i i get that
but um
he's
he's not gonna let you leave the city
you know he has control of the docks right
like that's where his
he is
he is the dock
shit
that's where the boats are
yeah
that's how you leave the city man
it
i don't think he's gonna let you go without a fight
oh boy
i
need to go
and you too
you can come with
actually you should come with
don't stay here
you'll turn into that old turtle man
let's go
let's get out of here
drive
the captain is
you guys
for sure
going to the docks right now
and he's all alone
and he possesses
no
no skills
uh
so you two
uh
drop your
leave your
little
your drug
your drug jars
and uh
bolt back out
into the street
and uh
continue
running down
the street
uh
chuck
squish
what's up with you
oh
so after i see
uh
the two
leave
out of the bar
to
very obviously
go get drugs
how was it obvious
you
pretty much screamed
in the bar
at rigney
do you sell drugs here
i thought i was whispering
yeah
you weren't
that's not the point
you're not here
oh yeah
that's right
you are outside
i'm no
i'm still at the
downtrodden toad
like right after
you guys left
i want to ask
rigney
how much it would
take to become
a business partner
you know rigney
i always see this
place full
you must be
raking it in
hand over
boot
hand over boot
that steps on your
face as a toad
or something
i don't know
yeah i'm a very
ugly man
that's that's
okay not what i was
getting at
but i want to become
a partner in this
place
partner
yeah
he thinks
and he's like
well
i have been thinking
of open a franchise
all right
here's my thought
listen
this town's not
very nice
there's not a lot
of really good places
to eat
and people don't
need good places
to eat
what they want
is fast
cheap
affordable
beer and liquor
and i'm thinking
we can open
one of these
on every corner
every corner
we'll start with
another one
maybe on the other
side of town
that might be a
good start
that's probably
a good start
yeah
how much would it
cost
yeah
perhaps in the
sewer
well
by the
docks
i think
is a good
area
docks
that's a
smart
lot of workers
a lot of people
coming need lunch
nobody wants to pack
their lunch
there's no refrigeration
what are you gonna do
salt
i've never even heard
of refrigeration
i know
it's it's it's not
even existing
i think you're just
making stuff up
now
let me think
well
to be a partner
you're gonna start
your own
you're gonna build
your own
uh
i mean
i was thinking
about just
buying shares
of this place
but
okay
it would be
six coin
my uh
average weekly
take
is about
two coin
a session
we're gonna say
two coin a session
so how about this
you buy in
for six
and uh
we'll see how
it goes from there
uh
hopefully we'll be able
to get this
business booming
okay
i can do that
do i get
do i get to cook
the food
because i just
lost a job
i mean
sure
usually we pay
people to cook
but if you want
to pay me to cook
i say go for it
i'll pay you
to be part of it
then i'll cook
here and it'll
increase business
sure
yeah
i guess that works
i mean we could
start offering food
considering
uh
well i don't
you guys have
never ordered
the food here
but i gotta tell
you it's
it's pretty bad
yeah okay
yeah no
i can tell
you'd serve
your drinks
in boots
it's you know
it's weird
you asked for
it once
and i thought
these assholes
what are they
gonna do with
drinking out of
boots
but wouldn't
you know it
that's what
people noticed
and now i got
all these boots
people leave me
you're welcome
that should knock
down my price
to five
all right
you won me
over
uh you're gonna
buy in for five
you're gonna start
working here
and uh i'll split
my profits with
you
should be about
two coin uh
a week or so
all right that
sounds great to
me
perfect
well
i'd say get
back there and
cook with what
you can find
but there's not
much so
you got onions
i got an onion
guy
uh there's
there's some
potatoes there's
some uh
questionable meat
some slightly
overdone pastry
i mean it's
really just
whatever i find
for leftovers
honestly i'm not
a very good cook
oh yeah
yeah no wonder
why you
nobody comes
here for the
food
you know if
you slather
things in
gravy people
really like to
eat it and i
think that might
be a direction
you could go in
gravy
gravy okay i
will definitely
think about gravy
let me get back
there and cook
something for you
so you know what
i can bring to
the table
you know what
other people don't
like they don't
like too many
spices too many
flavors confuse
the tongue
i think you're
wrong
well i guess
we'll see
and he
sends you
back into
the kitchen
which is
significantly
less nice
than the
golden plum
it's
kind of just
got one
counter
one table
everything seems
a little greasy
a little dirty
the bowls are
all kind of
gross
you wanted
this
you paid
for this
i paid
for this
there's
one kind
of dull
yellow
light
in there
that just
kind of
like
flickers
a little
bit
all right
well can i
make the boom
boom sauce
you would
definitely have
the recipe for
that that's
definitely within
your power to
make yeah
all right
i go up
and i uh
i assume
rigdy's got
a cigar on him
he looks like
that kind
of guy
yeah he
probably does
but it's
probably like
one of a
cigar that's
maybe been
like burned
a little bit
already maybe
he kind of
just snuffed
it out real
quick
okay yeah
no that's
fine
yeah okay
i take that
i make that
that the
same squishy
boom boom
thing
okay
that i did
at the
the what
was it the
golden lily
the golden plum
yeah yeah
that was close
yeah for him
to try
okay
and i bring
it out to
him this is
also my way
to relieve
stress
yes
okay
uh for him
to try
and see what
he says
okay
uh let's see
your uh your
stress roll see
how much stress
you reduce
all right
and what is
that again
i can't i
i know we've
done it a
dozen times
it is the
lowest
attribute that
you have so
in this case
it's along
the side
so it's a
one for
resolve
oh okay
so i just
roll one
yeah
oh boy
not good
well you
relieve two
stress though
that's not
bad
no but can
i pay to
do it again
sure
all right
i'll take
one
dash
kind of
like
oh
okay
yeah uh
so you
you make
the ingredients
maybe you're
not happy
with it
you go
out you
buy some
more
it's gonna
cost you
one coin
yeah you
can reduce
your stress
again
it turned
out the
same
you uh
you you
take the
dish to
to rigney
and uh
he looks at
it and he's
like kind
of pokes it
a little bit
and he's
like oh
well i
don't know
what you
made but
i appreciate
the effort
and well
it's got to
be better
than what
i usually
make
and he
uh
kind of
cuts into
it and he
he takes
a bite
and he
goes
kind of
scrunches
his face
he's like
i don't
know if
it'll sell
but it's
better than
what i ate
last night
which was
nothing
you ate
nothing
yesterday
i drank
too much
beer
oh that's
like a
type of
food
i guess
so i
had a
ham sandwich
oh it's
a ham
sandwich
yes
all right
well so
you've
reduced
some
stress
um
so has
everyone
done one
down time
or tiger
i didn't
i mean i
basically
did
yeah
but i
didn't uh
i don't
know did
you didn't
charge me one
of my
down times
for that
i don't
think so
because it's
not like a
healing you
didn't really
i mean benefit
yourself in
any way
i guess so
you did
montani
i had a
good time
i feel
like i
mean i'll
count it as
one of your
down time
no
i want
more benefits
okay well
then do you
want to do a
down time
activity do you
want to heal
yourself or
reduce your
stress or work
on a project
i am i'm
running like
i don't know i'm
really worried about
the captain because
i know that all
he's been talking
about is that
stupid boat for
way too long
and uh that
baz is going to
be looking out
for him that
it's almost a
trap and uh
while we're
running down
um i'm sort of
dragging tawny but
he's sort of
getting the idea
and um there's
several as we
run down the
street there are
several onion
carts that we
run by and i
just want to
snatch onions on
my way and eat
them kind of
like popeye
also apples
so they'll
boost your uh
boost your ability
to run faster
well i mean i
the idea my
original idea was
to relieve some
stress i think i
have some stress
um but yeah
kind of the
downtime thing
right
yeah yeah yeah
so that would be
your uh your
downtime activity i
like the idea too
that maybe you
guys are just
really high too
and you're just
kind of like having
this little adventure
to yourselves
yeah you're just
running down the
street and like
shouting and you're
like we got our
street we got to
hurry and people
are just like what
is going on here
and i grab an
onion from one of
the carts and i
toss it to tawny and
i say eat this
and just in this
complete manic
episode
uh he he'll bite
into it and it's a
sharp onion so he's
like ah makes a
face yeah that's
oh that's a good
one
so uh yeah
charles andrew you
can uh roll for
stress relief so
you're gonna because
it's you have no
resolve you would
roll uh two and
then take your
lowest all right
um
rough two two so
that's
you reduce
two stress
hold on he
does oh he has
none in resolve
right yeah oh
okay gotcha
yep um okay
uh okay
uh are we getting
one down time or
two down times
uh so you get two
down times each
okay so everyone's
used one you used
yours to reduce your
stress as you ran
i'll keep i'll keep
my one like everyone
else did so i don't
get behind
okay um do we
want to take a
quick break or just
keep going i gotta
get some allergy
pills i'm going
crazy over here
okay okay take a
break take a quick
one
okay um do you want to be
um do you want to be
okay um do you want to be
okay um so i'm gonna be
okay um so i'll be i'll be
Thank you.
Cool.
How was your vacation?
Oh, it wasn't a vacation.
It was a work trip and I, it was okay, but I, man, I was so, so happy to be home.
Oh, really?
Where'd you go?
Yeah.
Sweden.
You were just Sweden on a work trip and you're like, I can't wait to go back to Lockport, Illinois?
Oh, man.
No.
So, yeah.
My company is located in Sweden, but they're not located in like Stockholm or in Denmark and Copenhagen.
It's a tiny town, like the size of Kirkland is where the office is.
And then there's like a slightly bigger town nearby where people can like stay.
But, dude, it was like socializing from like 7 a.m.
to 11 p.m.
at night.
And then like I'd go to bed and wake up like, like I'd have to be at work with my like coworkers or do things with my coworkers all day.
We'd go home, like go back to the hotel for like 45 minutes.
And then they'd like meet up for dinner and just drink all night.
And it was like 10 days of that.
And at the end of it, I was like, I'm so tired.
I just want to sleep.
It was good.
I mean, it was, it was fun.
Denmark's cool.
If you ever get a chance to go to Denmark, I highly recommend it.
Copenhagen was a ball.
I didn't get to spend much time like traveling, which has sucked.
Brandon did though.
He went to Stockholm.
I don't know if he can hear us.
Oh, yeah.
I went to Stockholm.
That was where I stayed at the Hotel Diplomat.
Oh, yeah.
I remember that picture.
Yeah.
I was there by myself.
It was very cold there and very expensive.
That sounds about right.
There was an awesome ship there called the Vasa.
Did I tell you about that?
No.
It's a ship that was in the 1600s that Sweden made for their war against Poland.
And it was built too high and too narrow.
And the wind knocked it over in the bay on its maiden voyage.
And it sunk to the bottom.
And because the Baltic Sea is so cold and so unsalted, it didn't get destroyed.
It was very well preserved.
And so in the 60s, they raised it and pretty much rebuilt it from all of its original pieces.
And it's amazing looking.
It's like 95% of the original ship.
I think the masts, they redid the masts just to give you perspective on it.
But it's this huge building with this massive ship in it, like a four-story tall building.
Wow, that's really cool.
Yeah, it was really cool.
Really interesting stuff.
Yeah, I really enjoyed that a lot.
You know, because it's just cool because it's like a different time, different era.
They like had a bunch of different models talking about like, you know, the building of the ship and what the interior looked like.
There was like 400 and some people that would be on the ship, you know.
Yeah, it's kind of like seeing the USS Constitution in Boston.
Yeah.
Like just to see like how they, how the ships actually were at that time.
Oh, it sounded miserable too.
Yeah.
Like I said, I complain about airplane travel, but ships don't.
Being on a ship.
Months at a time.
1600.
Grant spaces.
Yeah.
But yeah, that was a cool part.
That was a ship.
There's a lot of moose in Sweden.
They have a large moose population, the largest.
And I was driving with this guy into work at 7 o'clock in the morning.
And we thought we saw a deer crossing the road, but it was a moose instead.
Those things are huge.
I mean, I know they're big, but until you see, like until I saw it, I was like, oh my God.
It's massive.
Yeah.
I see pictures online of like people like driving next to moose and like they're in these pickup trucks.
And the moose is like not comparable, but like pretty big compared.
They're vermin.
They need to be exterminated.
They're like deer over there.
Oh.
Do deer need to be exterminated?
Yes.
In some cases, yeah.
That's why deer season really exists because deer overpopulate really easily.
Yeah.
I think hunted, but I don't know.
Extermination.
That's a little.
Well, fair.
I mean, tomato, potato.
But no, I was just joking about that.
Apparently, Sweden does have the highest moose population in the world.
So there you go.
Oh.
What about reindeer?
No.
Specifically reindeer.
I had reindeer.
We had reindeer steaks.
How was it?
Kind of like, I guess gamey is the word, like a little bit more stringy than regular steaks.
You know, like it, I don't know.
I don't want to say it like fell apart, but like when you're eating it, it felt more like
you're like pulling pieces off than like a normal steak.
Ah.
But it was okay.
It was good.
I mean, a lot of red meat in general.
I ate a lot of red meat.
I love Europe.
Lots of cheese.
I didn't eat that because I can't.
But like every meal had like a cheese option.
I like their coffee.
Yeah.
Coffee's super strong.
Oh, really?
I wouldn't expect that in terms of speeding.
Oh, no.
Her boss complains at how weak our coffee is all the time.
Well.
So.
All right.
Who wants to start round two downtime?
Okay.
I'm kind of like, I'm kind of skipping my way.
Don't all right.
Down towards the docks.
Because I figure that's the best place to get my navigation device for the ship.
I think in my, my, my estimate as a brilliant pirate captain, we only really need like a long
pole and maybe like a steering rod, you know, and that should probably fix the whole thing.
I mean, I didn't really talk with the tinkerer about this, but.
I have a name.
I didn't really talk to Tinkerbell about this.
But I'm sure this will all work.
And I'm actually just really just in a really chipper mood.
And yeah, I make my way down to the docks.
What time of day is it?
Wednesday.
It's, it's like early afternoon.
Okay.
So people are there.
Like a light.
Yeah.
I mean, it's busy.
Like, like you're going to a shop, right?
Is that what I'm getting?
That you're going to like a place to buy the rest of your navigation.
You worked on part of it.
You've made as much as you can.
Now you're going to buy the last piece.
Yeah.
American sales.
Yep.
Buy domestic.
Yeah.
So as you're skipping down to the dock, you see a store that looks like it's selling,
you know, the sort of items that you need.
And you walk in.
Can I guess the name?
Sure.
Is it sales of sales?
Which, which sales is first?
Yes.
And when you walk in, you see kind of like a, just a middle-aged sailor bloke with like,
you know, with the little like white suit and his little blue beret.
And he goes, ah, I can see a, a, a fellow sailor when I, when I, when they walk in.
Hello, sir.
How can I help you?
Yes.
I am a sailor and a sir.
I need a navigation device for a barge.
Barge, eh?
Yeah.
I think, honestly, I think it's just gotta be like, you know, a stick about, you know,
a pole about, I don't know, eight feet tall.
Top of it, put a steering wheel.
Bottom of it, maybe something.
I don't know.
Well, I know, I know what you're talking about, sir, but I, I got some questions, some follow-up
questions, if you don't mind me.
You said you're, you're navigating a barge, right?
Yeah.
So you're going up and down the rivers and the canals of, of Doscaval, of course.
Possibly an ocean.
A what, sir?
An ocean.
What ocean?
I mean, it depends on, I'm not sure yet.
I haven't looked at my maps yet, but I plan on figuring that out.
You're not talking about the void seat.
You're pulling my leg.
It's pretty hard, considering one's a fake one.
And he pulls up his little stump of a, of a leg.
What you looking at?
I did.
Yeah.
It does say the void seat.
The X, I, X, I got to go to this X.
I like, but I like hide the map real quick.
Like, you know, that's where I got to go.
So you're, you're telling me you want to take a barge, which it typically just floats out.
I guess all the boats float on the surface, but you're, you're going to take a barge, uh,
which is normally known for, you know, pretty calm water, smooth sailing, you know, and you're
going to, you're going to put it on the void sea, a sea, which is known for both its monsters
and its storms.
Yes.
You're going to need a, you're going to need a good navigation device then, huh?
Oh, I'm sure.
Uh, you have a very fine establishment here.
I'm sure you can help me out.
I'm looking around and it looks like a tackle shop, like with fishing and it's got like nautical
puns all over the wall.
It's more of like a fishing decor shop.
Yeah.
It's like welcome home, please.
You know, I'd rather be, I'd rather be fishing.
Yeah, exactly.
You know, it turns out it's a, it's a, it's a fast food joint.
Turns out it's just a tackle shop.
Well, well, I wouldn't want to take your money on justly.
He says, but, uh, but it seems to me you've got quite a challenge on your hand.
Now, now you got some sales, right?
Uh, yes.
Maybe.
All right.
But you, but you don't have a steering vessel.
That is the, that is a, that the navigation system is in lacking.
Right now we're more of a autopilot.
Uh, free form is what we kind of do with the ship.
It seems to be working out.
We, we just, you know, throw a, uh, an anchor, you know, a cinder block out.
I mean, uh, an anchor out into the water and it seems to stop it from going too far.
Yes.
An anchor would work in a canal that has about eight feet of water altogether.
Uh, but you're going into the void sea, you know?
So you, so you're going to need, you're going to need an anchor, of course, a big anchor,
lots of rope.
Uh, yes.
But let's worry about the navigation system first.
Cause I need that first.
I'm sure we can, I have a lot of junk on this barge.
I can pretty sure I can figure something out with a better anchor.
Don't try to upsell me salesman.
Oh, oh, you got me.
You got me.
I, I definitely wasn't trying to upsell you and not, not trying to make you see the craziness
of your actions, but you're right.
Uh, you're going to need a good, good, strong steering wheel, uh, to get you through the
void sea.
I happen to have something, uh, that, that, that you can definitely see.
Um, uh, but, uh, you know, it is going to, going to cost you a little bit.
All right.
What's the damage?
Well, let me see here.
You, you, you, you promise you don't really, you're saying you don't want the anchor.
No, no anchor.
And, and you don't, I mean, don't want any more sales.
I need to know how much this is going to cost before I buy.
I need to know the navigation first.
Ah, I'm trying to get your bill.
See, but we, we run specials.
You know, if you, if you get to an anchor, you get the rope, you know, for a discount.
And if you get the sales, you get the rigging for a discount.
And if you get the wheel, you get, you know, the sales sales sales.
I get it.
He's that.
I finally realized the name of the places.
Why are you named it?
But, but, but, okay.
All right.
I, I'm, I'll be straight with you.
One sailor, one sea dog to another.
Uh, how big is the barge?
Uh, about a score.
Oh, a score.
Okay.
Well, that's a pretty big barge.
I've got to wheel.
Now, look.
I got to say, just so I can sleep well at night.
This is a crazy idea.
Barge ain't going to last on the void sea.
If you're not, you don't have any protection against storms.
You don't have any protection against whales.
But.
Whales?
Leviathans, sir.
But.
There's, wait.
Whales exist in the sea?
Leviathans.
Leviathans, too?
I thought, oh, I thought storms only happen on the land.
I could have swore I read that somewhere.
You're a good sailor.
I can tell.
You got fine sea sense.
Thank you.
And I'm not going to, I'm not going to, I'm not going to try to out, out, you know, to charge you out too much money or take you for a ride.
So I'll, I'll cut it to you straight for two coin.
I got the best steering wheel.
Sold.
All right.
And he turns around and there's like a steer, like a little like boat wheel that's been attached to the wall and he just picks it up and he hands it over to you.
Does it have a, does it have a rod that goes with it?
Well, sir, now that'll cost you extra.
I'm just kidding with you.
Of course it comes with our rod house.
You're going to attach it to your barge.
He got me salesman.
So he, he rummages around back and finds a very long rod for you to attach the wheel to.
And he hands it over to you.
All right.
Are we, have we made an accord?
With me, sir?
Yeah.
Do you need a receipt?
Uh, no, but do you want to have a drink on my, I'm about to finish my ship.
Let's have a drink.
And I pull out a whiskey bottle.
Ah, well, you know.
My frock.
Where else?
Come on, sir.
Let's do it.
All right.
I'll let you have, you can have one drink.
I'll have one drink on you.
Hooray!
Because guess what?
That is my, it helps my stress.
How much does that bring my stress down?
Because that's my vice, right?
Drinking.
I mean, you already used your downtime, but, uh, uh, you can roll.
Let's see.
We roll your stress for it.
What do I roll?
Two.
Two die?
Two die.
Failure.
Well, no, just three.
Oh.
So what do I, what do I bring it down, the stress?
By three.
By three?
Cool.
How do I get it to go away?
Uh, you roll, you'd have to roll, uh, at this point.
Have you taken your stress down?
No, I can't bring it down.
You just unclick it.
It's not working for me.
Oh, there it goes.
I re-clicked one.
Sorry.
There.
It's gone.
Oh, okay.
So I bring it down by three, you said?
Yeah.
Cool.
So you have one stress left, is that right?
Yes.
You'd have to roll.
Yeah, don't, I wouldn't recommend doing it again, because you can over-envolve.
And then you'll get another harm.
No, I'm fine.
I honestly, I don't.
I honestly, I kind of feel like I just got two birds with one stone, so.
Yeah, I'm going to count that as your, uh, your down, your long-term activity, since you
basically paid just to get the, uh, rest of the ship fixed.
Yeah.
And I got drunk with the salesman.
Well, he had a drink.
You, you've continued to drink.
Uh, and, uh, as you leave the, the store, uh, you run into, uh, an out-of-breath tawny and
chuckles.
Hey!
And I'm shaking this.
Captain.
Look at it.
Look at how beautiful it is.
It's like a nice wheel.
Good, nice knobs.
Look at those knobs.
You.
And I'm like really excited.
Listen to me.
Look at it.
Yeah, that's great.
You got ripped off.
But I think we can make it work.
No.
Cabin boy.
What?
We are going to, we are going to sail the sea.
I put my arm around you and, uh, we're going to sail the sea and I'm pointing at the ocean
with the rod and the wheel, you know, kind of like just pointing.
Okay.
I feel like it undercuts your point, but the ocean is that way.
Uh, but also we can't go to the ocean.
We have to.
We gotta go get my ship.
Yes.
But.
I gotta tell you, I'm a little drunk.
I had a drinky poo with that, uh, salesman.
Yes.
He, he sold you a big stick.
And we're going to use it to fix the barge.
What the hell are we going to do with a big stick?
You put it in the middle and you put it in that and you attach it and then you can drive
the boat.
And you're going to push it all the way down to the bottom of the ocean and like push off
the ground.
Yeah.
That'll work in the canal.
Who sold you this?
I don't know.
He's wearing.
He was wearing a sailor's uniform.
I kind of took him at his word.
At that long John Silver's over there.
Why are all these franchises opening up around here?
How many fast food places do we got here?
All right.
Well, uh, yeah, I, well, I think, yeah, we'll figure something out.
Yeah.
First day.
We'll see.
Uh, but no, the baths.
What?
Where?
Yeah.
It turns out he's so mad at us.
He's holding a grudge.
Oh, over what?
Down at the docks.
No.
Why is he holding grudges?
Who the hell knows?
I don't look backwards.
I only look forward.
That's new to my character.
And now I'm going to do it every time.
You smell like drugs.
Nope.
That's onions.
That is not onions.
I have been with you a lot of onions.
Have you been doing drugs?
Yes.
Listen, I feel like this conversation's been had with you about the nut punching, but we
got to talk.
You can't be doing drugs.
You're the cabin boy.
Yeah.
But look how happy Tawny is.
He loves drugs.
I just imagine him.
He's like just sitting on the curb, like just all spaced out.
Still crying.
No, he's not crying anymore.
He stopped that now.
The drugs fixed the crying.
But now, yes, he's now he's a little confused now.
He does look it.
Yeah.
Well, I feel like that's a fair trade.
Has he paid his dues?
I feel like we're all just looking at him like kind of like a parent's look at a child.
No.
He grows up so fast.
Now that you mentioned it, he has not paid his dues.
I'd say squish.
Check his wallet.
Or squish.
He's not here.
Or squish.
Squish.
You didn't bring squish.
Squish who?
I only look forward.
It's not backwards.
Listen.
You can't keep saying the same thing over and over again.
All right?
We have to find my ship.
You can't.
I got to tell you, I don't remember saying that.
I feel like these drugs are starting to kick in.
Or, well, if they don't kick in, I'm going to kick you.
Listen.
Tinker.
Please stop calling me that.
I have a name.
Chuckles.
Yeah.
That's me.
We're going to go tinker the barge.
And then we're going to, we can get away from Baz.
We can leave the city and go to the Kahuna Wave.
And then the ocean is ours.
The old wide ocean.
We can pillage.
We can smuggle.
We can sit on the boat in our underwear.
All day.
Yeah.
I'm not as attracted to the ocean as you are.
I can really sit with my underwear anywhere.
But I would love to tinker that barge.
Let's go tinker that barge, man, then, my lad.
Okay.
Are you heading back to the fort?
The barge, man.
Barge.
Sorry.
I think I remember attaching it to the bottom of a stream.
The bottom?
I hope not.
You get back to the barge.
And you start to assemble the rest of the ship.
You start to tinker it together.
You only need one to complete this.
So you're going to get it.
But do you want to rule anyway to see how good of a job you do?
Chuckles.
Yeah.
But I'm going to do an awesome job.
Yeah.
I'm sure.
You're going to do great.
You're probably going to make it even better.
Because, I mean, you're going to need to.
Yeah.
Because I got to tell you, I'm not happy with this guy that sold you this equipment.
It's just a wheel and a rod.
It's like a pinwheel.
Like, you ever see those pinwheels and you miss a big version of it?
Yeah.
Basically, you bought a Happy Meal.
He pulled it off the wall.
Success.
You successfully managed to take the captain's scraps and turn it into a functional wheel.
And with a proper rudder.
That's what the pole is for, is for the rudder.
Okay.
You managed to figure that out.
So you can actually steer now.
You also have some sails.
All right.
So you can catch the wind.
Okay.
Yeah.
Sails.
Woo.
I'm like, just like.
Just yelling.
Woo.
I'm just like cheering you on every time you accomplish one of your feats of technological
daring do.
Like, you know, you just jam the wheel in and out.
I'm like, yeah.
You raise the sails up.
Yeah.
Just watching over my shoulder.
Well, you know, moral assistance.
All right.
Well, that's annoying.
Yeah.
Okay.
Chuckles.
Do you want to have another, or squish?
Either one of you have another downtime activity you'd like to look forward to or do?
I relinquish my time to squish.
I would like to work on my rifle.
Just kidding.
You're back.
Okay.
So, yeah.
So, you guys, this is a pretty fancy rifle that you're working on.
You still have four more segments to fill.
Do you and Chuckles want to work together on that?
Ideally, yeah.
Okay.
I'll help.
Yeah.
What do I do?
Do I get to roll again?
Yes.
You get to roll and.
All right.
Tinker.
All right.
Hell yes.
All right.
Oh.
Success.
So, you.
Chuckles disappears for a while into his.
Into his.
Sweatshop.
What do you call it?
What are we calling it?
The laboratory?
Yeah.
At the.
In his laboratory.
And.
You hear some.
You know.
Grunts.
And some muttering.
And he comes out with a.
With a brand new rifle.
This is a.
Very fine.
Rifle.
Very accurate.
Very powerful.
Your rifle.
Oh.
Perfect.
I like to imagine.
While he's working on it.
I'm kind of like.
Sitting.
Like.
Leaning over his shoulder.
Just like.
Watching.
It's like.
It's kind of like.
When you're.
A kid.
And holding the flashlight.
For your dad.
That's like.
What I was doing.
For.
For chuckles.
And I got yelled at.
I.
I didn't yell.
Did I?
I'm going to keep doing it.
He's going to yell at me.
I'm going to get mad.
I'm going to have.
Problems.
Where I need to talk to a therapist.
About eight years later.
I'm going to.
I'm just going to keep doing.
My best.
Well.
Congratulations.
All right.
Well.
Chuckles.
That leaves you.
You have one more.
Time activity.
If you can take.
Pardon.
I.
I don't know.
I'm.
I'm really having a blast.
Can I.
Have.
Relieved stress.
From helping.
Both these people.
With their tinkering projects.
What's your advice?
Oh.
It has to be my vice.
Huh?
My vice.
I think.
Is just eating cat food.
Unfortunately.
You know what?
I'm going to say.
Yes.
Because I think.
I think the whole point.
Of you.
Working with your friends.
And both of them.
Cheering you on.
And being.
Very supportive.
Of your work.
And how.
It's all synergy.
So yeah.
Go ahead.
And you can roll.
For.
To reduce your stress.
Now.
Unfortunately.
Because you have no resolve.
It will be two.
And you take the lesser.
Of one.
Yeah.
You keep saying that.
Well.
You don't ever.
Add to your resolve.
It's almost as if you're.
Rubbing it in.
No.
I love the fact.
That you have no people skills.
I think it's a great character trait.
I wonder.
If anybody else.
Thinks that.
Nobody else.
Thinks that.
You reduce.
Three stress.
Which is very good.
Because you only had four.
Oh.
That was close.
I just imagine.
Like.
I'm sitting at the.
I'm sitting.
Like.
I can see in the picture.
I imagine.
We put the.
Like.
The steering wheel.
Like.
Right in front of the hole.
Just in front of the door.
Like.
Looking out.
Because like.
That's where we.
Of course.
Where I would put it.
And I imagine.
I'm just like.
I'm looking like.
Steamboat Willie.
You know.
Just.
I.
Just whistling.
Just whistling to myself.
I do have a question though.
How close are you.
To the hole.
Uh.
I mean.
If you could like.
Hole.
Or hull.
Hull.
I mean.
I'm not.
Enough.
If I.
If someone pushed me.
I could fall into it.
But not so much.
That if I.
I could walk into it.
Like.
Just.
You know.
Drunkenly.
Well.
So you don't.
I mean.
Do you have to.
Can you.
Use it.
While you're steering the boat.
I guess.
Is my question.
Yeah.
I'm steering the boat.
Looking out the front door.
Here on the fixture.
Okay.
All right.
So you.
All right.
So you do have to like.
Step away from the steering wheel.
To.
Say.
Relieve yourself.
Uh.
I could just turn around.
Okay.
You keep one hand on the wheel.
And then just turn with the other.
And kind of aim.
Yeah.
It's like.
Yeah.
That's a good.
That's a good measurement for distance.
Like.
If I were to turn around.
And keep my hand on the wheel.
I could probably aim.
And make it into the hole.
Number one or two.
Not for the full stream.
But for the additional.
Number one or two.
Is a pretty important question.
Just one.
I don't think two.
Two.
And I did need to put it on autopilot.
Which basically.
Which basically means.
I tie a rope to it.
With my hand.
And just back up.
Great.
So now we're going to have to.
That's something we're going to have to see.
Well.
You got to go sometimes.
Everybody hold on.
Captain's got to take a dump.
It's going to be good.
Everyone turn around.
As you.
As you guys.
Float down the sewers.
Discussing the.
Peeing while steering situation.
Meanwhile.
Up above.
In the docks.
Things are getting a little.
Little strange.
Baz.
Is currently walking around.
And he's talking to.
All of the ship merchants.
Including our.
What was it?
Long John Silver's.
Cashier.
That we bought your.
Supplies from.
And he's talking to various.
Port authorities.
And captains.
And he's.
Putting a picture.
Up.
He's giving them.
A poster.
And the poster.
Is of you three.
And the poster.
On it says.
Do not.
Give service.
To these men.
They are.
Wanted.
Men.
Oh shit.
I knew.
I forgot something.
You brought it up.
Very.
Briefly.
Yeah.
But then I forgot about it.
I got into the zone.
Maybe.
Dee Dee.
One night.
One afternoon.
While she's running around.
Comes back.
And she hands you guys.
The poster.
That she collected.
That's not good.
Letting you know.
Oh I thought you were going to show us the poster.
Dee Dee.
What does this say?
I don't have one.
I'm sorry.
I don't have one.
Are you asking Dee Dee to read to us?
I don't think.
I don't think any three of us can read.
No.
What are you talking about?
It's one of my vices is reading.
Oh yeah.
You can.
You can read.
It just so happens my other advice.
And my other vice is drinking.
Which is significantly worse.
I just know.
I can't read.
You keep saying that too.
You said it.
Yeah.
Only when pressed.
Does it change the fact that.
You say it.
Yeah.
So the sign just reads.
It's a picture.
It's a kind of a crude drawing of the three of you looking straight onto the camera.
And it says wanted men do not service.
Oh.
Guess what guys.
We're not being serviced anymore.
Do you.
Do you think they hung this up in the brothels?
Do you think they hung this up in the bars?
In the bookstores?
Oh no.
Anywhere else?
We're in trouble guys.
We got to take Baz out.
What about the toad?
We got to get out of here.
That's what we got to do.
We got to.
Yeah.
We have to find my ship.
Well I'm part owner of the toad now guys.
I don't know if I told you that.
You didn't.
Yeah.
I bought half of the toad.
So does that mean we own half the toad?
Because we're.
Yeah.
What does that mean for me?
Exactly.
We're a team.
We have all.
Yes.
A dollar for one is a dollar for all.
That's what we've always said.
You get 10% off of your drinks.
I'll take it.
All right.
But.
You don't pay for your drinks anyway.
But now I'm getting 10% off.
So he's going to give me money to drink there.
That's.
That's not how that works.
I mean the math checks out.
That's business.
Yes.
All right.
Well.
Yeah.
That's the end of.
The downtime session.
The downtime.
Thank you.