Hail the John Fork boys, in the night they roam,
solving woes with fire and coal.
With a clash and a clash and a twist of bait,
explosions mark the hours never leave.
Knowledge is power, but maybe not this knowledge.
The gang regrouped after a less than pleasant parting from Highwater Manor.
Things were tense.
Squish made a baked Alaskan, which is not a fish,
and served it to Captain Fitzcline.
They two shared an awkward dinner.
Patches got drunk in a hammock.
Chuckles, still mourning his loss from Lady Highhill,
was in a right sour mood.
Luckily, his friends joined him to try and cheer him up,
and they had one genuine heartfelt moment together.
It didn't last.
The captain revealed he planned on breaking through a demon armada
surrounding the Tichero's castle.
He then planned to fight his way up to the bell tire
to play his harp and let all those who hear it fall under his sway.
Patches thought this was a bad idea.
Squish and Chuckles were okay with it.
The evening ended with an intervention for Hotman,
who doesn't believe he has a fire problem,
since it's kind of in the name.
Chuckles is also attempting to learn how to read on a sly,
all secret-like.
And don't you dare try to help me.
And that is a picture of Chuckles hiding under his blanket,
attempting to read his one fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish.
I'll have you know I learned almost three words.
Was one of them fish?
Oh, by yourself.
Two of them were fish.
Wow.
Interesting.
Red fish, blue fish, one fish.
Can't get fished again.
So what's going on here?
Game's briefly paused.
How's that for you?
I mean, I can see the boat.
Is that what I'm supposed to be saying?
Yeah, that's all you're supposed to be saying.
Yeah.
So the captain has gathered you all on deck,
and through his binoculars that he passes down from one of you,
and then you pass it down to the next,
finally getting to you, Chuckles.
You see all the way through the binoculars,
out in the distance,
a fleet of ships with white sails.
This is the Ticharos fleet.
You are entering the Bay of Ticharos,
and there is a fleet of ships there awaiting you.
They're sailing the white sails.
That means they surrender.
No, lad.
Unfortunately, most sails are just white.
We also have white sails, if you haven't noticed.
Oh, I thought we were surrendering.
That's not off the table yet.
There's a lot of them.
This is a bad idea, lads.
To surrender?
No.
No, I think surrender is pretty good.
And as you approach,
this is kind of what it's going to look like from above.
So you guys are at the bottom of the screen.
This is the Kahuna wave.
And there is, yes, a fleet of seven ships,
seven brides for seven brothers,
seven ships for seven people.
across the bay.
Oh, there's eight.
Sorry.
Turns out I'm really bad at math.
Scratch that.
There are eight brothers.
Scratch that.
Eight brothers.
Oh.
But can I count?
Yeah, of course I can count.
There are eight ships.
I just can't read.
I wouldn't be able to write it down.
Yeah.
I see eight ships out there.
Yeah.
How many ships do we have?
Currently, we have just the one.
Do you have any ghost ships?
No, we have a ghost crew, though.
I just have one question for you, Captain.
What do you have in your bloody mind?
We can do it.
Come on.
I've seen you take on rougher seas than this.
Tougher.
You're more tough than the toughies.
You're smarter than the smarties.
You guys can handle this.
Oh, you want to fight them.
Wait.
Yeah.
What?
You're the captain.
Yes, that's right.
And I say full steam ahead.
But I do believe in democracy.
You do?
Especially democracy manifest.
So we can outvote you?
No, but if you come up with a better idea, I'd like to hear.
And I don't really want to plow my way through eight angry men.
Does this boat go underwater by any chance?
No, the boat does not go underwater by any chance.
Juckles, can you tinker it underwater?
Because I think they're going to tinker us underwater.
Maybe if I had more time, I could sink this boat.
But I don't think that would help.
I was hoping it was a submarine, you see.
A submarine?
Isn't that a sandwich?
It looks like a sandwich.
A real big sandwich.
But it also goes underwater.
All right.
Well, so we're going to fight these guys, huh?
No, no, not necessarily.
So we can turn around.
Let's all vote on it.
Who wants to turn around?
Bridget, can you turn up your mic a little bit?
Can I turn up my mic?
A little soft compared to Tiger.
Hold on.
We have been shouting you down a lot.
I've just been yelling at you.
Don't take it personally.
How's that?
Is that better?
Oh, that's much better.
Okay.
Yeah, actually it is.
We've been messing with settings.
We've been learning and exploring and finding out a lot about my audio system.
Who says you're dumb as hell?
And the friends we made along the way.
Oops.
Okay.
There we go.
All right.
Sorry, I had to maneuver you guys around.
Yeah.
So just to give you an idea of what the city looks like, it is a large crescent-shaped city.
You can just barely see the land.
You can see some vague outlines of buildings.
You can't really see much, though.
But the city is largely crescent-shaped.
And yes, there are these eight ships kind of sitting out in the bay, kind of doing some just regular patrols.
They're just going back and forth, to and fro.
They have not spotted you yet.
You are far enough away.
And you are only one ship on the horizon.
This is a relatively busy port.
There are things coming in and out of different areas of the water.
The point is that you have not gained any sort of real attention at this point yet.
They also have red sails.
Yes, they do.
So they're not surrendering.
Any chance this boat flies?
Like Herbie the Love Bug.
Lad, I've never heard of Herbie the Love Bug.
But I guarantee this ship does not fly.
Unless you happen to propel it in some manner.
But it's not a flying ship.
So, Captain.
Can you turn into a real name?
What?
No, he already asked that.
Oh.
He said, what, is that a sandwich?
And I said, yes, kind of.
It was very funny.
Oh, you mean like a grinder.
A grinder.
Well, it's more of a hoagie than a grinder.
Oh, a hero sandwich, I hear you say.
You could say that.
So, Captain Fitzclyde, what the hell are we supposed to do to get to the city then?
If that is your real name.
It is definitely possibly my real name.
I don't know.
I mean, I thought we could just go in, guns a blazing, hot man, a throw in.
No, no, no, no.
Wait a second.
We could use hot men.
No, no.
We got to talk to him about that.
Listen, we just had a talk.
I got to put, he's grounded.
Man's ground.
The hot man's grounded.
All right.
You grounded hot man.
We had an intervention.
He was out of line.
He was out of cooking control.
We had to put him.
We had to, but he's got, we got to take it.
We got to take a break with him.
He's got to, he's grounded.
I think we reached him.
Yeah.
I think we did.
I think this was a bad time to ground hot man.
Turns out, but we cannot turn back now and undermine him in front of the children.
We absolutely can.
Listen, we are this close to a breakthrough on hot man.
If we ever want hot man to be a productive member of society, we cannot turn back now.
He will never be a productive member of society.
Wow.
We need to give him a chance.
You just don't believe in him at all, do you?
He did not care for our intervention.
Okay.
He did not listen at all.
We need to move past hot man.
Hot man, not an option.
However, is there a chance that Neelix can dress up as a female ship?
No, no, we don't.
First off, is this in character or out of character?
And what?
Of course it's in character.
Okay.
I don't know what you're talking about.
I don't have anybody named Neelix.
Neelix?
Who the fuck is that?
Oh my God.
Good catch.
You know, Neelix, the ghost butler you have in your pocket?
No, no, no, no, no.
I don't have him.
Neelix is gone.
Neelix was, I don't know anything about that.
Neelix?
What's a Neelix?
Anyway, hey, look at those ships over there.
There's eight of them.
What do you think we should do to get past those guys?
Tiger's pissed.
He's leaving.
He is pissed.
Oh, I had to get my card.
Yeah.
So.
So anyway, what's the plan?
What's the plan?
Why don't we just blaze ahead?
Do we have the speakers on?
Yeah.
What's going on with those speakers, Tinker?
But.
Are currently.
The speakers.
Yes.
I was meant to talk to you.
Those speakers would have been very useful about, I don't know, a day or so ago.
But yes, we're halfway through with speaker creation.
Yes.
I can create speakers.
Just let me at them.
Where's your, where's your wires?
I'll know on them.
I mean, my wires.
Our wires.
The ship's wires.
So you, you did in fact get wires for those.
You also had.
Oops.
Apple opportunity to do it.
If you did.
I was learning to read.
You have the means of them.
I'm putting it on the board right now.
Of making them.
It's just the process of making them at this point.
Okay.
So let me at it.
You want a delay so you can make some speakers?
Oh, I mean, I, I'm just saying I could work on these speakers.
If we can just stay out of eyesight long enough to work on these speakers and then give the captain unlimited power.
Then I'm a big fan of unlimited power.
Well, what we're doing here, what is going on?
I would like to finish the speakers.
It's been hanging over my head.
Now that you mentioned it.
All right.
I think you should finish them so he can play and we can at least get a couple ships on our side.
Or I could fashion us a different submarine.
I think that might take longer.
And what do you mean different?
As in, as in not the boat.
Oh, no, I'll make the sandwich.
No, no, no, no.
You can make a sandwich.
Good idea.
I like this plan so far.
Okay.
And I will make a capsule that goes underwater that we can get in and sneak by the Armada undetected.
I think you still have to finish the speakers though.
For what?
To give the, to give the captain unlimited power.
What guarantee can we have from you that you can build a submarine when you can't even build some speakers?
Listen, I can build the speakers.
I told you I could build them.
I just need the chance.
Can you, can you make sure that half of the submarine doesn't explode?
No.
So this is the gas masks all over again.
Oh, it's always 50-50.
I don't like those odds.
You tinker some, you blow up some.
It's just the nature of life.
Not everything's perfect.
Now.
All right.
Let's get you in one of those submarines.
Me?
Okay, fine.
I'm just saying, okay, so we have options.
Speakers.
All right.
And also give the captain unlimited power.
No, we do not want to do that.
He's a fucking mad.
Sorry, sorry.
Is he listening?
Two, we get Neelix to dress up as a female ship.
Right.
We don't know Neelix.
Just saying if there was a Neelix.
Hold on, hold on.
We don't have a Neelix.
We have a Neelix.
A Neelix.
And she can be a female ship.
She can be there already.
We have a Neelix.
I don't know anything about this Neelix the butler, but we have a Neelix who likes to dress
up like Patti LaBelle.
But also a ship.
No, we said Mary Antoinette, right?
Yeah.
Okay, so that's option two.
Option three, I guess, is to just...
The Neelix is a black woman.
So is Neelix.
Racist.
And number three, we can just go straight through and fight him.
How many cannonballs do we have?
I think we only have one left.
We had three.
One went through the ship.
Yeah.
One you used to hit the Iron Vulture.
We did.
We lost that nuclear cannonball, remember?
How useful that would be right now?
Yeah, we kind of lost it on that one, didn't we?
Yeah, I shot my wad.
You do have one cannonball left.
I believe that was the agreement.
I don't think that's enough.
Just enough for a warning.
Okay.
While you guys are arguing, you're starting to steadily grow closer towards the ship.
The general tide is taking you in.
Uh-oh.
Make the speakers.
What about a distraction?
Well, get Neela.
No, besides Neela, different distraction.
We will build a raft, and we will abandon the Kahuna wave,
and we'll just go right around the Armada as they start to encircle the Kahuna wave,
and we'll just ride a raft.
Now, yeah?
What do you think about that, Captain?
Let's just abandon the ship.
No, the Captain can stay.
What?
You guys will do a sneak through the Armada.
Mm-hmm.
Get to shore.
Sneak around the Armada.
Right.
Okay, sneak around the Armada.
You'll get to shore.
I like this idea.
I like it a lot.
Right.
I really appreciate the initiative that you've shown, the forward thinking.
Yeah, remind you, no bad ideas.
No bad ideas.
My only question is, what do you do once you get on shore?
I don't know.
What are we doing here?
I feel like there's prizes over there.
Yeah, so let me restate my plan.
Oh, yeah.
Number one.
Teacheros people will eat you.
They won't eat you.
No.
We'll put you on the raft.
Okay.
All right.
Get me out of here.
All right.
You and your baked Alaska.
Get the hell out of here.
Good.
All right.
So, Squish, you get on the raft.
You pass through the Armada.
They say, oh, nothing to see here.
Just a man on a raft.
You land into Teacheros Bay.
And then, what do you do?
How do we get ourselves across?
Infiltrate the local government.
All right.
I should become president.
Then I can let you through.
There is a monarchy.
Presidents is not really a thing there.
So, it's a monarchy.
Oh.
So, run for king.
I say we just rush the, where you got to go.
You got to get to the top of that mountain, right?
We, yes.
So, step one, blast through the Armada.
Two, make way to castle.
Step three, get to the spell tower.
Ring these, ring this fucking harp and have a good time.
Oh, right.
That's the plan.
Yeah.
So, I definitely need to get the harp and me through Armada.
But I love the idea of you guys going on a raft.
Wait.
Do you know how to make a raft?
I could play the harp.
Why do you need to play the harp?
I'll play it.
Well, it's my harp.
I'm the one who, you know, I got it.
Arguably.
I mean, arguably.
And in the fact that I have it and you don't.
And it's my harp and I'm not giving it to you.
That's true.
Mm-hmm.
Maybe we should fight him.
Can your ghost pirates go on other ships?
Yeah, of course they can board other ships.
They're pirates.
Oh, all right.
Let's go ahead in.
Oh, I saw this on the History Channel.
We'll just build a ship that looks like ours.
And then they'll go after that ship.
And then we'll beat them from behind.
So decoy ship.
That's option four or five.
I lost count.
We've got a few here.
So option one, speakers.
Option two, this Nila woman you keep thinking of.
I would like to have known there's a third party, a fourth party upon our ship.
Fifth party at this point.
Neat legs.
Number three was to blast our way through.
Number four, we're on number four decoy ship.
Oh, no.
Number five was decoy raft.
A lot of decoy related plans is coming to my mind right now.
He's right.
I do not want to charge directly into the Armada.
That's my one no vote.
I'm using my veto on that.
Do you want to use.
Well, if you build the speakers, as soon as they get close, we can use the heart to get them to obey us.
You're right.
I already used my veto.
I'm powerless.
I must give.
I must give the red captain ultimate and absolute power.
Yes, because after that, if he if we decide he's evil, still on the fence.
We can destroy.
No judgment.
We can destroy the heart.
How are you still on the fence?
He's murdered his entire crew to make his own ghost crew.
And they've been very helpful.
You were part of his crew and you're still alive.
I'm you need to one person that should have died.
Have we ever flesh tested the gray captain?
Get away from me.
And I get closer.
I like give you a good start kick.
In where?
The leg.
Ow.
Like like a real good charley horse.
one.
All right, fine.
All right.
Fine.
I'll get started working on the speakers.
Now, keep in mind.
Squish.
Once we give him absolute power, you also have absolute power over us.
So we're not going to be able to make decisions after he's got the ukulele.
Yeah, we should probably get like earplugs or something, right?
We should get it in writing.
That he won't use his power against us.
Yes.
I was just going to gollum that shit and steal the fucking heart.
Oh, we talked.
Is he right here?
We is.
He's not listening.
Right.
You guys, this this grace, the entire time you've been talking, he is completely like walked
away from this conversation.
He's in his room plucking his harp.
He hasn't even noticed.
Like you guys haven't even noticed that he's still there.
All right.
Okay.
So I was going to say, I was just going to gollum that shit and just rip the harp out
of his hands.
Right.
When he got into the spot, I mean, we can get him up there, get him up there.
Then we take the harp.
We take the ship.
Kings of the world.
I start rubbing my knuckles.
I start rubbing my nipples.
Knuckles.
Oh, my.
Oh, I need to eat it.
There go my nipples again.
All right.
Well, I've heard enough.
I'm going to start working on these.
These.
I say.
You.
I say.
Okay.
Here's what I say.
You fix your speakers.
Get these.
Get this shit out.
That way we can get by this armada.
And then we let them get up there.
And then we take the harp for ourselves.
And we take the ship.
And then we get the fuck out of here.
I got to say your, your mutiny idea is compelling.
Suddenly.
You know, the ship has ghosts on it, though.
Listen, I have a conspiracy.
I, I, I have a conspiracy that I've, I've, I've got somebody on my side.
You know.
No, if you guys listen to us, if you guys listen to the last session, you know, I, I talked to somebody.
I got, I got, I got somebody.
I got an inside man.
Remember that at all.
I know.
I also did listen to it.
Let's just say.
He's hot.
And he's got one broken arm.
Oh my God.
I keep forgetting about Tawny.
Yeah.
He's been here the whole time.
What do you mean?
You got a man on the inside.
Oh yeah, you did.
You convinced him to mutiny.
It was very easy for some reason.
You guys stop.
You guys stop in your little circle and you all turn to Tawny.
Who's been here the entire time.
And he's like, guys, don't I get a vote?
No.
Interns don't vote.
Also.
Nope.
You're supposed to be the inside man.
All right.
You're going to go downstairs and try to integrate yourself with with Captain Fitz Clyde.
Yeah.
Go hobnob.
Yeah.
Go hob that.
I don't.
I don't really have to like hobnob anyone.
Right.
Like I just got to go talk to him.
Well, just, you know, go sweep the floors.
That's what hobnob means.
Yeah.
And just make yourself look really good in front of him.
And clean my room.
So.
So Tawny goes and he leaves after the captain.
He's trying to ingratiate himself with the captain who's in his room.
So if I understand correctly, Chuckles, you're going to start working on the speakers.
Squish and patches.
What are you going to do?
I don't know.
I'm going to help Chuckles with the speakers.
Because I got one in Tinker, too.
And I'm going to menace Chuckles while he builds the speakers.
It just really bothers him.
Yeah.
You guys are really annoying.
All I want to do is Tinker.
I'm just joking.
Oh, you're not menacing?
I mean, I do imagine he's lording over us.
Just tapping his foot and crossing his arms.
Yeah.
How long is it going to take for you to tinker those speakers?
Really, it's a situation of how long is this going to take?
Which is directly proportional to how drunk he's going to be by the time he's finished.
What?
Hold on.
Hold for power.
I've somehow hidden all of you.
I'm here.
All right.
Okay.
That's not going to work.
All right.
Cool.
Yeah.
So you have two sections left on your task.
So I'm going to say it's going to be two solid roles you'll have to pass, which I don't doubt you're going to be able to do.
But in the meantime, you guys are drifting closer and closer and closer to the ship, to the other ships, because none of you have thought to put down the anchor.
So you are drifting closer and closer to shore.
And as you drift closer and closer to shore, Patches, you're on the deck, and you start to hear shouts from the other crews in front of you, hailing to you, trying to get your attention.
I wave back politely.
Very nice.
One of the ships kind of like leading the charge, you can see it's a complete demon ship.
So everyone who is on this ship is, in fact, part of the Royal Ticharose Navy.
Oh, my God.
There's so many on one ship.
And they're looking at you.
And one in particular comes out.
He makes his way to the front of the ship.
And he calls you and he goes, hail, Captain.
Hail.
I wave back.
Hello.
What's the name of your vessel and what is your purpose?
Oh, we're just drifting along, you know, just enjoying the views.
Are you are you without?
Do you need a do you require a you're you're really just kind of drifting there.
You're not really seeming to be in any control.
No, no.
We're we're good here now.
How are you?
We just misplaced our anchor.
Yeah.
Have you seen an anchor?
I don't think you would.
I don't think I highly doubt it would have floated by, but maybe you hear this like metal, like
and you see him pull out his telescope.
And now he's got his sights on you.
Patches.
I assume that squish and chuckles.
You've gone below deck to work on the tinkering.
Correct.
Yeah.
Are you still?
I followed.
Junkles.
I just thought it was in the back of the boat because the lights better over there.
OK, so he sees he kind of zooms in and all he sees on board is he sees patches standing
by the wheel of the ship.
Correct.
Oh, I'm like at the head of the ship.
Kind of.
You know, I'm I'm kind of like this.
I'm I'm visible.
Just waving politely.
Him.
And then he sees he sees squish and chuckles.
He sees you kind of working in the back.
He can't really quite make you out.
But what all he sees, this demon captain is one ship that appears to only have maybe three
people on it.
And he goes, I have to warn you, if you if you approach any closer, we will have to board
your vessel.
Do you have any papers permitting entrance into Ticharos?
Tell him to shove it.
You're not here right now.
No, I'm here.
I'm negotiating.
Yeah, but hopefully you can't hear me.
All right.
My paper are, you know, it's the damnedest thing.
I left my papers in my other pair of seat pants back at port.
No papers.
No, we're really just going to drift right by.
We'll be fine.
Just let us just drift right by.
I go up to the front as a demon and go, they're just I just hired this crew to take me home.
That's exactly it.
We're hired by this by this fine, fine red skinned fellow here.
This man, this purple demon sees you squinch and he he hails you and he goes, I hail demon brother.
I wait politely back.
Your name.
Sunder.
First.
Sunder cats.
Tarquish.
Sunder cats.
Your name isn't familiar to me, but welcome home.
I still presume you have some sort of papers or proof of landing or the ships are starting to come into like some sort of they're getting closer to you.
Essentially, they're kind of coming into formation.
Cap chuckles.
Let's go ahead and have you roll for your your tinkering.
You picked the wrong day to fuck around with my tight crew.
And my tight pants.
Hold on.
So I see the sea.
I'm not in the scene.
Oh, hold on.
So my bad.
Hold on.
Let's get you all in there.
Beep.
There you go.
All right.
And roll tinker.
Roll for tinker.
Now, are you getting any assist from squish or squish?
Are you yelling?
I wish I left to talk.
Yeah.
I kind of abandoned that.
Okay, cool.
So it'll just be like standard.
I'm going to assume that's a pass.
Yeah.
It says.
Okay.
So you tinker a little bit more on this and you're starting to kind of get the shape of the speakers.
But it's just kind of like the outer shell at this point.
Like all the guts and the wires are still exposed.
You're going to need a little bit more time.
Guys, I'm going to need a little bit more time, but I'm making great progress.
Got the shell going and everything.
It's going to be a beaut.
So you got the shell going?
Yeah.
Shell of the speaker.
You know, that's where the speaker goes.
In the shell.
No, I have no idea.
Anyway.
Right.
No, I got my paperwork.
Or all my paperwork is at my parents' house.
Well, at my family's house.
And his other pair of pants.
And my other pair of sea pants.
This man, by the way, I don't know if I showed a picture.
Hold on.
You did.
He's blue.
Purple.
Wow.
Purple.
This is Lord Buckram.
He is the portmaster of Ticharos.
He's not a fool.
And his sole duty is to ensure that anyone coming into the port is of safe being.
And you guys have just fed him a very strange tale.
That you have hired a boat to take you back home.
Which isn't strange in itself.
It's strange that it's a human crew coming to a place that eats humans.
But maybe you're weird like that.
And you've also both used the sea pan excuse.
So he's a little suspicious.
He's going to send one of his ships to come around.
And this is not the ship he is on.
But it comes around.
And it does like a little clocking of your.
It just kind of gives you a good once over.
It spins around you.
And it's taking a look at everything that's going on.
Are you just standing there?
Waving politely.
It's kind of like.
Like Forrest Gump on his boat.
Exactly.
You know.
I'm just standing there impatiently.
Okay.
Given the other captain of the boat.
Like state guy.
Oh he's in his room.
Oh.
Do you mean.
The captain of the boat that came.
I see.
Yeah.
Lord Buckram.
Okay.
Patches you.
I'm just trying to look very nondescript.
And wave.
And.
What do we do?
Well I guess we just got to wait.
For them to pass.
And realize that we're really.
Where's the fucking captain when you need him?
No harm.
I feel like we're just alone on deck.
On top deck.
And no one's controlling the situation.
Nor the boat.
Where is the boat?
I'm going to ease over to the wheel.
And just kind of catch.
Can you drop the anchor?
I got to look for the lever.
So I'm pretty sure it's a lever.
Pretty sure.
Yeah.
I'll go up to the.
I'll go up to the wheel.
Hold on.
It's like.
And I'm just very casual.
Like walking over to the.
To the wheel.
Just waving at the.
Hey.
How you guys doing?
You know.
And I get.
You make your way to the wheel.
And Patches you're very familiar.
With how a ship runs.
Do you.
Super familiar.
As you.
Remember.
You have been reading up.
And reading your book.
Captaining for dummies.
So you know.
Where the anchor is.
Are you going to pull the anchor.
And lay anchor.
Yeah.
I'm going to.
Pull the anchor.
So we can do a quick.
Little turn.
Because we're kind of drifting.
And it's going to.
Yeah.
You're kind of.
Drifting towards them.
You're not in any sort of like.
Clear control.
Okay.
So you lay anchor.
And you're just going to stop.
Where you guys are.
Poof.
Roll for anchor.
You've laid anchor.
Right.
The ship does its little.
Little look over.
It's.
You know.
It's still very strange.
It's still a very large ship.
Only powered by.
Again.
Three people.
One of whom.
Seems to be working.
Furiously in the back.
So.
And many are invisible.
By the way.
Yeah.
But he doesn't know that.
Yeah.
Maybe we should tell him.
Watch out.
There be ghosts.
Why would you.
We tell them.
I'm just going to keep.
Working on the speakers.
You guys figure out.
The hard stuff.
Yeah.
So he.
You.
You guys.
Put the speakers.
Or put the speakers.
You put the.
The ship.
Into balance.
And you are.
Somewhat getting surrounded.
They are not.
Particularly.
Buying your story.
At this moment.
Unless you'd like to try.
To persuade them.
With a better one.
But you are slowly.
Being surrounded.
Tell them.
You know.
I would like to.
To yell out to Lord.
Lord.
But run.
That.
You know.
I came for my.
Grandfather's funeral.
I didn't have time.
To get my papers.
In order.
Your grandfather.
I do not have.
In fact.
Have.
Another pair.
Of sea pants.
It is great shame.
That I only have.
One pair.
As.
A shame.
To us all.
It appears.
Your grandfather.
And his name.
Tarquish.
Sunder.
The.
Second.
Oh.
Are you.
The third.
The fourth.
No.
I would be.
The fourth.
Technically.
No.
I am actually.
The sixth.
I have two older brothers.
That are the fourth.
And the fifth.
You are making this up.
Right now.
Aren't you.
Shut up.
Shh.
Maybe I am not.
You don't know.
You have never asked me.
About my life.
I have asked you.
Several times.
And what did I say.
You gave me a.
You gave me.
A very rude gesture.
And then told me.
You are finding out now.
We are going to see.
If this is going to convince him.
It did.
So he is convinced.
He.
He lowers his hat.
He goes.
Oh.
Sir.
I too.
I know what it's like.
To lose a beloved grandmother.
Or a grandparent.
I am so sorry.
For your loss.
Of course.
We understand.
We will.
Thank you.
Guide.
Sorry.
Thank you.
We will guide you.
Towards the dock.
And make sure.
We can get all the.
Replacement paperwork.
You need.
Before you.
Before you leave.
If you just.
Follow us here.
Sir.
We'll.
We'll lead you.
Right into.
Shore.
Okay.
So they're.
They're going to.
I appreciate it.
A little.
A little bit of an honor guard.
For you.
So you got four.
Surrounding.
And four.
Speakers.
Leading.
No.
Well that's up to you.
So Tiger.
Or sorry.
Chuckles.
Do you want to.
Complete those speakers.
What's.
What's going on.
On the ship.
So on the ship.
It is.
Well.
Once the captain.
Lifts up the anchor.
You are allowed.
To go into port.
You'll be allowed.
To dock.
You won't be allowed.
To really do much else.
Because.
As much as they believe.
Your story.
It's less of.
We're not going to attack you.
On site.
But we're still not allowing you.
Into the city.
So.
It's really up to you.
If.
What you're currently doing.
Right.
But I don't know that.
No one's told me.
What's going on.
Oh.
Not at all.
We just.
We just did this.
What did you just do?
We're getting an honor guard.
Escort.
Into the port.
What did you tell them?
My grandfather died.
Which may.
Or may not be.
True.
Wait.
Do you have a grandfather?
I could totally.
I assume everyone does.
That's not what I asked.
Yes.
I have.
Or had.
A grandfather.
Okay.
So.
Do we need this speaker?
Yes.
All right.
I guess I'll keep Tinker in then.
All right.
Please do.
All for Tinker.
For Tinker.
Yeah.
All right.
Oh.
Yeah.
So you finish.
You give the.
You give it a good bang.
And you have made yourself a pair.
Of like.
Really old school.
Heavy speakers.
Like the kind that are kind of like.
Ungodly wieldly.
But you've made a pair.
With all the appropriate.
Wirings as needed.
Yeah.
Congratulations.
You have Tinkered.
A pair.
Of sneakers.
And sneakers.
Wait.
You guys wanted speakers?
I thought you said sneakers.
Turns out just a pair of shoes.
I thought we were.
All going to run away.
From the.
Ships.
Uh.
Let's just take a quick break.
And then we'll come back.
You.
Your little.
Escort.
Escort guard here.
Right.
You got the four closest to you.
The four.
Leading the way.
As you guys are starting to head.
Back to shore.
Uh.
What.
What do.
What are you all doing?
Uh.
You have just finished the speakers.
Uh.
Chuckles.
I.
And I'm sure you announce it.
I announced it over the speaker.
Hello.
Is this thing on?
I jump.
Scared.
Is this thing on?
Yes.
Testing.
Jesus Christ.
Testing.
Yes.
It's on.
Okay.
Stop yelling into it.
Okay.
I was just testing the speaker.
How does it sound?
Loud.
Cool.
Can you turn it down just a little?
Never.
Grandpa.
Uh.
Let's not create up grandpas right now.
At the sound of the speaker being, uh, deployed over the now created sound system.
Uh.
the captain Fitzclibb opens up his, uh, his, uh, his, uh, office door and he sees you and he's like,
oh, lad, you've done it. Hello, captain. Hello. Hello. Oh, that's perfect. That's so loud. How
brilliant. Look at these speakers I've made for you. Uh, it is loud enough that the, uh,
the other ships that were in the area can also hear you.
Just so you're, uh, also where they have, uh, all turned and are looking at you now.
Uh, and they see this new man sitting on top of the, uh, on the deck now, uh, captain
Fitzclibb has left his room. Uh, he goes down to you squish and he, he, or I'm sorry, he ups
down to you, she chuckles and he gives you a big, big, you know, pat on the shoulder. And he's like,
my boy, well done. What a, what a marvelous machine of science you've created here.
And I tilt my head towards him, preferably specifically the top of my head, which is full of
hair. Oh, of course, of course. And he, and he ruffles your hair for an adequate amount of time.
Thank you.
Makes it all worth it.
Uh, he sees that you are surrounded. The captain sees that you're surrounded by these, these four
ships and he goes, so boys, what was the plan here?
Well, we're getting escorted into the port and that's it.
So now you're here.
Please take over. Cause this has been very awkward.
Please captain.
Of course. Of course you, I expect you want me to take the harp and strum and bring everybody
into our sway. Is that, is that the course of action?
I know. Yeah, that would be, now that you say it, that's a really good plan. You should
do that.
You should be the captain.
No, no. Okay. Yeah, go ahead.
I just realized where I'm at.
Uh, he goes, uh, back to his desk. He is going to get the, the harp. Uh, uh, patches,
you hear like a tiny, like, tick, tick, tick.
What was that?
Tick, tick, tick. It is the, is the sound of one of your bottles being tapped on from the
inside.
Tick, tick, tick.
Hello?
Uh, you, you pull out Neelix.
Uh, Neelix is in like a little like silky, like,
pinkish robe. You can't really tell cause he's a ghost, but he definitely has like some
sort of robot and like fuzzy slippers and it's like hair is kind of in curlers. And he's got
like, you know, it looks like some sort of like face cream on and he goes, sir, sir. I came here
as soon as I've heard. I can't believe it. You've you, what have you done?
Neelix, Neelix, this is not a good time. We are surrounded by a armada and, uh, uh, what are
you wearing?
I, uh, I was taking self-care is very important to everybody. And just because you ignore it
doesn't mean that I will.
I take self-care.
I take lots of self-care.
What, you get drunk in hammocks?
Ah, burn!
Whoa, sassy Neelix.
I didn't expect to be a hammock attack at night.
They're very sassy.
I did not expect to be hammock attack at night.
Sir, if you, if you understand, if you hear the speakers, you will be under his
thrall as well. There'll be no stopping him.
I mean, is he going to sing this now? I mean, I was going to try to just, you know,
kind of go on that.
What does Neelix know anyway?
Yeah. What is, I mean, listen, we'll just, we'll just, we'll just, we'll just.
What do you think?
Okay, Neelix.
Who, is he, am I there?
I don't think I'm there. I'm sorry. I'm interrupting.
I'll go back to, uh.
Do you want to be, do you want to be like hiding behind something?
Like, you know, like a little, little creeper?
Yeah.
I think this is actually knowledge that maybe the rest of them should know.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Listen, is this the type of information that the game master has been trying to tell us
over the course of several episodes?
I'm sure it wouldn't be like that.
All right. Listen, what do you suggest we do?
Cause I was just going to like, want, let him get like, we were going to get up there
to where he needed to play his little harp thing.
I didn't think, I didn't think we'd get the harp this early.
I was going to just take that shit from him.
And then, you know,
I'm just warning you.
If he, if you fail, sir, if you fail, you will be compelled to do all that he wants, all he desires.
Alex, I didn't know you cared so much.
One of us is mutating him.
If I had known you cared this much when I stole you from him, I, I, I, I'm so happy I stole you.
Even though you're in a weird robe.
Um, I will figure something out.
I'm going to work with the lads.
Yeah. Listen, um, if I call you out again, you gotta be, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's just put on your best dress for the night.
You know, pretend like best dress.
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Listen, I've come up with a great plan.
He probably won't expect to see you in a dress.
So this has been great.
I just came up with this and I can't believe it took me three sessions to come up with this, but like, uh, just, just come out.
Like you're dressed for the nines and, uh, you know, we'll go from there.
All right, sir. That's just, I hope you know what you're doing.
I hope you know how to dress fine.
And.
Okay. Well, he, uh, he disappears back into the bottle with a little pop.
Um, the captain has come out with the harp.
He's managed to string kind of like a large strap around the front of it.
So he does carry it in front of him.
The harp is big enough that like, it's not like a tiny little hand thing that you can just strum.
It's a large harp that you have to like maneuver to play.
It's a pretty big harp.
Uh, and he, he comes out onto deck with this.
Now, uh, the other ships have slowed.
Um, uh, they are, they heard the speakers go off, uh, loudly saying, does this work?
Does this work?
So their attention has now been, uh, been peaked by whatever is going back on about the ship.
And, uh, although you did sway and convince them that your grandfather is dead, this has all just become very shady to them.
Um, Squish is, can I, can I, uh, talk to Squish?
Yeah, of course.
Mono a mono.
Squish.
Yeah.
Yes.
Can I talk to you?
Yes.
Mono a mono.
Yes.
Uh, I'm starting to have reservations about, uh, I mean, starting and continuing to have reservations about giving the captain almighty power.
Why?
Well, you remember my ex-girlfriend?
No.
Uh, well.
She was very high.
Yes.
We were very much in love and we were this close to making it to first base if it weren't for all that fucking smoke from Hotman.
I mean, apparently you weren't that in love then.
Okay.
All right.
Let's, let's save, let's save knocking me down, Pegs, till later.
But she did tell me very important information, which was the captain is evil, the red captain.
And why should we believe her?
Because she's, I mean, fair, fair question.
However, I think given the stakes, perhaps we should, uh, you know, tread lightly.
Well, if he can get us past this, we'll need ear, earphone or earbuds to stop us from hearing the, the harp.
He can get us out of this.
And then once he's in a more vulnerable spot, let's say on the top tower of a castle where one could easily be pushed.
Then we'll take care of the problem then.
I feel like a lot of things have to go right for that to work.
Whereas we could just not give him the speakers and like, I don't know, build a paper mache grandpa.
And stage a fake funeral.
And then.
What is with you?
What is with you and making decoys today?
Decoy grandpa.
Like the fifth option for decoys that you've mentioned.
I'm just saying, I've seen a lot of Disney movies where the bad guy gets ultimate power and then bad things happen.
Yeah.
But we'll be on the, his side.
We're like the ones that got him there.
We'll be like honorary princes or something.
So you want to be evil.
Yes.
Now I understand.
Can I go talk to the gray captain?
Not without me?
No, I am.
I didn't say that out loud.
I'm just going to, I'm just going to sidestep and walk over to the gray captain.
I was weird.
He just left.
Yeah.
After finding out I want to be evil.
Evil.
It's really weird.
Gray captain.
You are?
Listen, you and I have had our differences in the past.
But I have no one else to talk to right now.
I've got some pertinent information.
Oh, pertinent.
Two, two pieces of pertinent information.
Both very, very, very pertinent.
Right.
All right.
I imagine we're just like, like kind of hunched over, like kind of like trying to keep this real.
Yes.
Please.
Very, very, very casual.
Hunch with me.
Because we cannot let them hear us talk.
Okay.
Yeah.
I think it might be a bad idea to give the captain this ultimate power.
I agree.
I definitely agree.
Yeah.
Do you remember my smoking hot ex-girlfriend?
The hot mama?
Yes.
The hot mama.
The hot demon mama.
I don't remember her name, but I remember she was very kind to you.
Yes.
She was.
And we almost made it to first base.
And we would have if it weren't for hot men.
Now, that aside, she also told me that the red captain was evil.
I've been saying that since the beginning of this season.
We have trust issues.
Okay.
I know that.
All right.
And we're slowly rebuilding those trust issues.
And this is the first time I am starting to meet you partway.
All right.
And rebuilding these trust issues now.
So I had a plan.
Please don't tell me your plan was to bum rush him after he was already all powerful.
No, no, no, no.
I was going to jump off the boat.
He can't.
That doesn't help me.
I can't hear him underwater.
That's what that was my.
No, no, no, no.
That's your plan.
That was my plan.
That was your plan.
That's plan B.
That was plan.
That was plan A.
But now I'm thinking about plan B.
You know what?
I think it's time for.
Juckles.
Let's smash.
And Juckles.
And I get down on one knee.
I put my hands on your shoulders.
I go, Juckles.
Is it?
You need to nut punch the right captain.
Nut punch him.
You're the only one who can get close to him.
He trusts you equivocally.
You get close to him as soon as he's about to play that harp.
And then you nut punch him.
And I'll swoop in and take that harp.
Or you can take it.
I don't care.
Just don't let him have it.
All right.
I have the concept of a plan.
Yeah.
Just really ingratiate.
Which is not sexual.
It just means it's really like, you know, hang out with the guy.
You know.
Try to.
Tease him.
Keep him wanting more.
I've seen him.
He has tussled your hair more than he ever tussled mine.
You know.
Wow.
And he trusts you.
Did you ever build him speakers that would give him ultimate power?
No, no.
I built a mutiny.
Okay.
Probably something he liked a little bit less.
It turns out I'm really good at building mutinies.
It doesn't.
It's a work in progress.
Okay.
How about this?
You start growing a mutiny on Tawny.
I got it.
Just in case.
I need some backup.
Some backup.
Nut punching backup.
All right.
Like I said.
Let him do what he's got to do.
And then you nut punch.
And then we'll swoop in and we'll do what we got to do.
All right.
Well, we need a code word.
What do I yell when we jump into action?
Whoopee.
We got to do better than that.
Yar.
I might say yar on accident.
We've been saying that a lot.
Have you been saying that a lot?
It's rubbing off.
All right.
How about Fandango?
I like it.
All right.
Sorry.
All right.
I'm going to Fandango.
When I say Fandango.
Winnebango.
Yeah.
When I say Winnebango, you jump into action.
Okay.
I'm going to sidestep over to Squish.
All right.
Squish.
Good news.
I got good news and I got better news.
All right.
What's the better news?
I'm just going to pretend like I'm not listening.
Like I'm just like real casual, like just looking over the other edge.
I'm not listening.
I really am not out of character.
Any character either.
I'm not listening.
Okay.
I'm going to let, I'm going to, I'm going to give the red captain speakers.
I'm going to plug his harp right into the raw feed.
I like it so far.
That's it.
The better news is you were right all along.
I don't.
Let's be evil.
I don't think your talk with the gray captain would have ended with that.
With Fandango.
No, I don't think.
Roll for deception.
Detect lies.
Well, it did.
He's a weird, he's a weird fellow.
I just had to tell him that.
Try to sway me here, but don't break kayfabe.
All I'm saying is he never considered the fact that we could just be evil.
He was thinking we had to be good.
And I said, no, we can be evil.
Your little five minute chat with him decided to made up his mind that he could be, and is going to be evil.
Did I mention he's really drunk?
That's a given.
That's, that's assumed.
Yes.
Right.
So do you want me to roll deception or I don't know who I meant?
Oh, no.
Because, because, all right.
Well, here's what I'll say.
Chuckles, I, I don't know who, if you're deceiving the cat, if you're deceiving Squish or you're deceiving Patches.
One of them is clearly being deceived.
I'm going to let you decide which one you're deceiving.
What I will say, though.
Perhaps I don't know.
Yeah.
I will say, though, Squish, if you want to roll to see if you believe Chuckles, I 100% will allow that.
Yeah.
So Chuckles, let's see.
No, I want this to be for Squish.
Squish, I'm going to have you roll an insight roll to see if, if you can actually detect if Chuckles is like lying to you or not.
So if you go to resistance, it's insight.
I don't think my, oh, I guess it is pretty good.
You, you are not sold by what, by what Chuckles is saying, but not because you think Chuckles is lying, because you don't know what the fuck he's saying.
You realize that he is just like in some sort of manic mood.
You've seen this before from him where he is just something's up in his little brain and, you know, either something's going to explode or something is going crazy.
You know, something's up, but you don't know what his true plan is.
And to be fair, I don't know if, if Chuckles knows what his plan is.
All right.
Well, after knowing that, I pat him on the, I get down on one knee and pat him on the shoulder.
And then I walk and I, I go up and I help the captain put the harp by the speakers.
Yes.
So the captain has brought over his harp.
He is strapped in.
Chuckles, you're the only one who knows how the speaker system works and how to get it set up.
Right.
I imagine it's kind of like an electric guitar.
Yeah.
He's got it strapped on.
He looks like that guy, that guy from, uh, from fucking, uh, Mad Max.
And he's standing there in front of, I stand there in front of the speakers and I've got this cable that I pull out from the back of the speaker and I'm going to go in and I say, captain, are you ready for this?
I'm ready for this.
I'm going to tell you, you're, you're helping me complete a lifelong dream here.
All right.
I'm going to, all right.
I say, okay, well, let me see.
So let me see the harp.
Show me the port.
Uh, he flips the harp onto one side and you can see where there's like a clear port at the bottom.
All right.
And then I get on my knees, uh, in front of him, in front of the port.
And then I'm going to wallop him right in the nutsack.
Roll for wreck.
All right.
Oh my God.
I can't watch.
Oh my God.
this is like the most important thing.
You push.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
I'm going to punch with two hands.
You want to stress yourself and give yourself a bonus.
You definitely can.
Yeah.
Okay.
Very stressed.
Take one stress and you can roll an extra wreck.
All right.
An extra.
So is that S plus one D?
Yeah.
Plus one D.
All right.
I mean, even if you, even if you don't succeed, he's going to hurt.
Does anyone else want to assist him?
Captain, uh, or I'm sorry, patches.
Do you want to assist in any way?
Are you watching?
Are you like, I've been like, I'm like hiding behind a mast kind of like watching very casual,
like, you know, and I'm close by.
Like I, I, my plan is I'm going to, I'm going to run as soon as I see you do that.
And like either grab the harp or grab the captain.
I haven't decided yet.
Okay.
You're not going to like, there's no way you're going to assist in this.
Uh, no.
Okay.
Perfect.
Uh, yeah.
All right.
Let's, uh, let's, uh, let's, uh, I swear to God.
So you wallop the captain, uh, he's not expecting it.
And he's like coming to sit down to hold the harp.
So it definitely gets him.
You're going to get him on surprise.
It was like the most perfect, like he's like mid squatting to grab the harp and you just
turn and just fucking uppercut his uppercut his two fists, by the way.
Oh, double uppercut.
Um, yeah.
So the, the captain, uh, isn't expecting this.
He's taken it back.
He's not like, he's just shocked, you know, that this has happened.
So he's just kind of in a state of shock.
What are the rest of you doing patches?
What are you doing?
I start when you see this.
I start running and I run towards the, which way towards the harp.
No.
Um, I would like to sit down and play the heart.
Uh, all right.
The court is, the court is not, is not plugged in though.
But you guys are in your shot.
Right.
Yeah.
I think it's probably pretty clear what, what was going on, but I'm just saying it's not
plugged in.
Right.
It's, it's not plugged in.
It is still wrapped around the captain.
Cause he does have that strap on.
Um, so it's a race towards the, uh, a race towards the, uh, the harp.
Uh, let's see.
What do we got?
That's out of context.
He does have that strap on.
Uh, both of you roll a finesse and whoever gets the better role will get there first.
Just standard finesse.
Cause you're going to both run for it.
All right.
Fuck me.
Patches.
That wasn't great.
He knocked you lower too.
Uh, squish just manages to get to the heart before you.
Uh, what are you going to try and do with this harp squish?
Um, I'm just going to play a couple of chords.
All right.
Uh, so you start playing a few chords.
Uh, I'm going to say that the only people who can hear this, who are in here shot are within
squish or chuckles and the captain.
Um, so you play a few chords squish.
Now, the way that this harps works is that you have to roll, uh, like a high value finesse.
Um, so let me just pull this up for you.
Just make sure I got this all figured.
Is that like a five or six?
So it's going to be like the modifier of it.
It's going to be a desperate role.
And the effect is going to be, uh, pretty limited at this point because none of you know how to play a harp.
So if you want to roll, that's what your modifiers are going to be for rolling the harp.
Right.
A finesse.
Yeah.
And then desperate.
And then, yeah, limited, uh, limited effect.
Because again, you don't.
Limited effect.
Because you guys haven't been practicing the harp.
All right.
And I'm going to push myself.
Yeah.
If you want to take some stress, go ahead and give yourself another one.
Take one stress.
Oh.
It just makes like a discordant, like, noise when you, when you strum it.
And it occurs to you that you've never actually practiced this.
And you saw how hard the captain was practicing.
You heard how bad he was at this.
So he's been, it's clearly not an easy thing to accomplish.
Patches, you have now reached the harp after hearing this horrible noise.
What are you going to do?
Once you reach the.
Can I grab the harp?
Yeah.
Are you trying to play it?
No, I'm trying to chuck it off the boat.
Okay.
Go ahead and grab it.
Let's hold on.
I'm going to, let's say, do, do, do.
Finesse.
Yeah, I'm going to have you roll the same kind of roll.
So you're going to roll a finesse roll.
And it's going to be desperate.
And limited.
Does he have to fight me for it?
Not yet.
Okay.
Wow.
So, Patches, in a moment of glory, somehow you are able to pull the harp and you just break the strap.
And you just, you just, with one mighty tug, pull the strap off of this.
You have the harp in your hands.
Now what?
I thought.
Now what?
Yeah.
What do you do with it?
I'm chucking it overboard.
I'm throwing it off the boat.
That was the whole goal.
I'm going to throw this damn thing off the boat.
I'm going to punch him before he does.
Okay.
I've never had two players going to fight each other before.
So this is fun, I guess.
Haven't we been your only players?
Well, I mean, I've never had this come up.
No, no.
There's been others before you.
How dare you?
You don't need to know my body count.
Okay.
Uh, you're so, uh, yeah.
So, uh, you're going to punch him.
Squish.
Yes.
Okay.
Go ahead and roll your, uh, your skirmish.
And then Brandon, you're going to roll a resistance.
You're going to roll, uh, a prowess resistance roll.
Just normal.
They're both going to be normal.
No.
Hooray.
Standard.
Yeah.
So, uh, you are able to dodge the punch from squish.
Uh, and then Pat just tell me how you throw it over the, how, how you throw that harp overboard.
Oh, very, very clumsily.
But I love it.
Like it's a clear, like, like I'm like, like holding it and I run and I just, I'm like, like, just throw it overboard.
Like, it's like a, like a, it's very desperate.
Uh, this, you, you, you fumble around with this, this harp and you get to the edge of it and you just, you chuck it overboard.
And in a moment of pure silence, you all watch as this harp just crests the arc of the ship and then just falls into the water below with a plop.
Boop.
Do, uh, do harps float?
I'd like to go look to see if the harp floats.
Hold on.
Oh, I'm not going to lie.
You guys, I was just instinct.
I didn't have any plan.
No, clearly.
I don't know what's going to happen.
Uh, the, the float, the harp floats, uh, but it is slowly sinking.
Uh, the captain.
So no, it doesn't float.
No, but it's not like, it's not like a straight, like, it's not just thinking straight down yet at this point.
Um, the three of you are over the edge looking at this black harp that's starting to slowly disappear under the waters.
And then individually, you turn to see Captain Fitzclyde who is glowing in anger.
And when I say glowing, I mean, you can feel the heat radiating off of his body.
Now, Patches, you have seen this before.
I'm going to let you get, decide what you want to do to survive this.
I, I slowly make my way towards, uh, Juggles.
Juggles.
Remember plan A?
I thought that was plan A.
No, plan B was the nut punch.
Plan A, jump ship.
Why did we do plan B first?
What?
All right.
We got, like, look, look, like, I'm not going to leave.
I won't leave you to get, he's really pissed.
He is really pissed.
Okay.
I turned to squish.
Oh, don't, don't talk.
Okay.
Squish.
Squish is already standing on the railing to try to dive in after the harp.
Oh my God.
It turns out we turn around.
Squish is already.
All right.
Bottoms up.
Oh yeah.
You don't know I'm going after the harp, so.
You should know I'm jumping overboard.
Well, I mean, it's, it's not a bad, it wouldn't be a bad guess.
No.
You're going overboard?
I'm jumping overboard.
Right by the harp.
Perfect.
One overboard.
Patches.
You're next.
What are you doing?
What is the red captain doing?
Is he going to say anything?
He's about to charge you.
He's so angry.
He's kind of, his brain has short circuited and he's not quite sure what to do yet.
But you realize, like, you see the thoughts turning and the wheels turning in his head as he just realized what's happening.
That you have just ruined, again, his life work.
He starts taking a couple of steps towards you and you can, like, his hands are reaching out to you.
He's going to try and kill you.
I'm just going to throw it out there.
Okay.
You ruined again, his life work.
I grab Juggles by the shoulder and, like, we're, I feel like we're just both backing up slowly.
Wait, wait.
You're grabbing me?
By the shoulder?
We were next to each other when he was walking up to him.
No, I'm not picking you up.
I'm just, like, trying to, I'm just, like, holding on because, like, this is really scary, man.
Hey, no, wait.
Uh, Captain.
Like, I'm freaked out.
Plan C.
What's plan C?
Throw me into the grate where my, where my bedroom is.
Throw me through the floor.
Is that nearby, Bridget?
Is it close enough?
Yeah, yeah.
So, if you guys can imagine, like, your grate is at the front of the ship.
You guys are relatively, like, towards the center.
Like, he could conceivably pick you up and throw you.
So, if he rolls well enough.
All right.
Chuckles.
Is this a good plan?
Uh, I don't know.
All right.
I'll, I'll do it.
But he's going to kill me if you don't come up with something fast.
He's pretty pissed off.
All right.
So, I grab you.
And I'm going to lob you.
Kind of like this I did with the harp.
Okay.
I imagine it's kind of like, like, like an underhand, like a, like a dart ball kind of thing.
Yeah.
Like a drunken cheerleader.
What's, what's the role, Bridget?
For that.
If it's like the harp, that's a finesse role.
I've not been really great with the finesse.
All right.
Or a wreck.
Partial success.
Okay.
Yeah.
Chuckles.
He, uh, he throws you, uh, he is gonna like, not a, you're, you're not going to make it
a hundred percent.
You're definitely going to, it's going to be less than graceful.
Um, and then I am going to say, because, uh, patches, you are going to take, uh, an additional
stress for that.
Okay.
Because now it's just you and the captain on deck together.
Now, captain, I understand your pit.
Did you already have the stress or do you want me to?
Can you add it?
Oh, I can do it.
Do I have stress?
Okay.
You added it.
Yeah.
Now, now captain, how long?
Oh, go on.
Yeah.
So chuckles, you kind of tumble your way through the gray.
It's not a graceful landing.
You kind of just like, wow, land through where your bedroom is.
Okay.
Um, we'll come back to you in just a second.
Um, squish, you have thrown yourself overboard and you are now swimming, uh, to try and catch
this, uh, harp before it falls.
Yes.
Yes, I am.
All right.
Let's see.
Oh, I threw, when did I get rid of you?
I'm so sorry.
I'm used to it.
I'm not sure what you're going to do once you catch the harp, but I'm interested to find
out.
Uh, yeah, go ahead.
And, uh, I'm, I'm assuming this is you trying to swim as fast as you can.
Uh, I'm just going to say it's a finesse role to try to like actually capture the harp
before it gets too deep.
All right.
Awesome.
Yeah.
So you're able to, uh, to just barely with your fingertips, grasp, grasp the harp, uh,
before it goes too far into the deep and now you're making your way, you're swimming with
one hand.
So you're not swimming super great.
And then you've got the harp in the other, um, Chappels, what is your plan?
Once you've fallen through the grade?
Oh, I'm going to start throwing clothes everywhere.
Like I'm looking for something, just throwing them all over the place.
And, uh, I would like to unearth, um, underneath one pile of clothes, um, one specifically cannon
shaped pile of clothes, uh, my, my bitching flaming, uh, cannon.
Yeah.
I'm going to say that you find that this is your bedroom, you know, where things are.
Uh, so you are able to find that cannon.
What are you going to do with that cannon?
I'm going to aim it straight up and try to fire through the floor, um, directly at the
red captains.
Not saying.
Uh, uh, all right.
Uh, that's going to be, that's because you're trying to aim at the captain and you're trying
to basically just do a vertical shot.
I'm going to have you roll your finesse for that one too.
I'm sure I have plenty of that.
Uh, you definitely have more than zero.
Surprising.
Guys, I don't know about you, but I am wrapped by this situation.
I just do not know what's going to happen next.
Um, all right.
Well, yeah, I light the fuse and I yell out Winnebago.
Uh, the cannonball, uh, the cannonball just, this is your last cannon, by the way, your cannonball
thumbs up, um, and it lands right at the captain at Fitzclyde, like right by his feet.
It doesn't hit him in the balls, but it does like crash him through, uh, the floors of the
ship.
Like it just basically like, and just comes tumbling back down.
Uh, he falls into the floors below and kind of disappears, uh, into the dust and the darkness
below.
You guys have given yourself a few moments to figure out your next steps.
Uh, I run over to the window.
I run over to the window where, uh, the broken window.
I assume Juckles has fallen through.
That was one hell of a shot, lad.
Yeah.
I mean, I was pretty close.
You got him.
You didn't get him in the nuts, but you got him.
Wait.
So what happened to him?
Is he dead?
Is he, is he red mist?
No, but I would definitely try to get up on top deck.
He's probably going to come out pissed.
You definitely, uh, he took the cannonball and went through the floor.
It was incredible.
Uh, I've never seen anything like it.
Uh, I do not think we should be around a mess with him when he kind of comes to it.
Might be like the end of Ninja Turtles too, where shredder comes back and starts kicking ass.
Okay.
I haven't seen that one.
Uh, but can you help me help out of here?
Yeah.
I reached down to hold my hand out.
You need a jump.
Yeah.
Can I jump up there?
All right.
Yep.
Uh, yep.
Pull me up.
Fandango.
Winnebago.
All right.
Uh, well, now what are we mutinied?
Is this a mutiny?
Uh, it's, it's, it's starting to be, it's starting to be.
Where's Tawny at?
What'd you say?
He, when Tawny hears the word mutiny, uh, all of a sudden he just like the door flies open
and he's like in some, he's got like a sword wrapped around his chest and like a couple,
two swords each in a hand.
And he goes, mutiny.
Mutiny.
Uh, Dee Dee from who plays in the crow's nest, uh, kind of slides down the pole and she's
got her own little daggers and just.
Um, uh, squish.
You have managed to make your way up.
You're still holding onto the harp.
Uh, swimming.
I, we, have we ever said swimming's your strong suit?
Can you, you can swim, right?
I think so.
I thought you were afraid of water.
I hope so.
No, I'm afraid of ghosts.
Yeah.
Aren't they afraid of water?
No.
Okay.
Wait, are they?
No.
Okay.
I had to check.
Um, so you are able to make your way back, uh, to the ship.
Now you haven't climbed aboard yet.
Um, but all you hear from the top of the deck is mutiny, mutiny, mutiny.
As everyone's chanting, uh, are you going to climb back aboard?
Well, I connect, I mind meld with Dee Dee to have her come help me up.
Uh, Dee, yeah.
So Dee Dee hears you, uh, and she scampers down.
She's very nimble and she scampers down the side of the ship into the rigging.
Uh, and she, she holds her hand out to you, uh, but she sees the harp and she has like this
animalistic reaction to it.
And you can feel this through your bond where she's just like, like, like, uh, uh, just very
sure.
It'll be fine.
All right.
Uh, you're able to reassure her cause you do have this bond that you built with her and she
does trust you.
Uh, so she does help you back onto the boat, but she's very wary and uncomfortable with the
harp that you now possess.
All right.
Well then I would like to try to play it again.
Sure.
Yeah.
So same thing.
It's going to be the same.
Oh, I'm on the boat now.
Oh, sorry.
Sorry.
Wait, where on the boat?
There's not like a, it's, there's not like a flat area on the back of the boat.
Like it's not a pickup truck.
Well, I jumped, I jumped off like right where it was going to be played before.
Um, but that was like on top of the boat.
Huh?
Yeah.
So you are, you guys do see him pull over, uh, onto the side and you see DD's with him and
he's soaking wet.
Um, I'm going to say though, that you guys are kind of busy in your mutiny champ.
Um, she's right.
She's right.
Fair is fair.
Well then I'm going to take my time to plug it into the speakers.
Uh, so Chuckles is the only one who knows how these speakers work.
So, uh, you're going to have to convince Chuckles to, uh, to help you with that one.
All right.
Chuckles.
Stop your mutiny cheer.
Mutiny.
I see you come to your sentences.
My sentences.
Yes.
Mutiny.
That's a sentence.
Are we doing it?
Come on.
Come here.
We're this close.
I got an onion for you.
I feel like this is a trick.
Last time you did this, you bopped me on the head.
I did?
Yeah.
Flashback.
Uh, you, you made a trap where you put an onion in the middle of the deck of the boat.
Uh, cause we were really bored out at sea.
And I came out like a rabbit, like that gopher from, from, from Caddyshack.
And then I went over by, went over by the onion and you hit me on the head.
Ooh, piece of onion.
Just like that.
I got to the big onion at the end and you walloped me with a big piece of wood.
And then you started laughing and, uh, my, my trust was shattered.
Okay.
Well, I'm sorry for that kind of, um, it was, and still is funny, but please, please hook
this up.
I feel like it's a bad idea.
You don't know that.
No, of course I don't know it, but what are you going to do?
I don't want to give anybody absolute power.
Who says power has to be for evil?
Oh my God.
You sound like Hitler.
You just said it was evil earlier.
You just said, I want to be evil.
And that's true.
You did say that.
I want to be evil.
That's the, uh, not of the character.
Long con.
Against me?
Yes.
Against me.
So then why would you?
I, I don't agree.
Obviously it was against you.
Okay.
But I'm, but then I, that doesn't really make me want to hook this harp up.
I feel like you're going to abuse it.
The power you haven't, you don't even have it yet.
And you're about to abuse it.
Yeah.
I'm going to try to sway you.
I refuse.
Oh, I'm not, I'm not listening in.
I'm at the front.
Like, uh, I'm looking down the hole where the captain fell.
You're trying to find him in there.
No, I just want to like, sure.
I'm just watching, you know, this is not, you know, I don't think that killed him.
And in fact, uh, you have, you heard him crash into the floor below.
Now you guys know how this ship is, is set up.
If you, if you need a reminder, here's a quick outline for you.
Uh, so you guys are normally hanging out.
Hold on a second.
Well, it says, isn't this just be all.
Why can't I zoom out?
Anyway.
Um, yeah.
So there's the top deck, uh, you know, where you guys hang out.
Uh, there's this, uh, lower deck, uh, the front chuckles where you're like icon is right
now.
That's your, your bedroom.
And then there's like the bottom of the ship as well.
Uh, that's the hold area.
So he's on this like bottom floor or that's what you suspect anyway.
Cause you have not heard any noise, uh, coming from.
Coming from the bottom of the ship after the initial crash.
Did I really misspell onion?
Yes.
Ooh, piece of union.
So you're looking at this hole that is no longer, uh, making any sort of noise.
Chuckles, squish.
You guys are arguing about the harp.
Yes.
I'm refusing.
I'm refusing to plug in the, the harp to the speaker.
Well, I would like to use, try to use my sway against it.
Uh, sure.
If you use sway, uh, troubles, you can, uh, resist that.
Uh, that would be a resolve role.
Well, we've never had to do this kind of shit before.
I don't think.
So if I lose the sway, then I'm just convinced.
Uh, whoever gets the better role essentially would do it.
All right.
Well, I'm not rolling sway.
I roll resolve.
I have no resolve.
Yes, that is true.
Uh, okay.
Uh, so.
How did I succeed?
I didn't think I had any resolve.
You reduce or avoid the effects.
Weird.
Oh.
Or you suffer five.
It should have picked the one.
If you have zero in it.
Right.
Oh, no.
If you go to your, if you go to your resolve, you can have one thing in there.
And that might give you something.
Seven.
So if you have two dots in resolve.
But I don't, I have zero.
Oh, zero.
Yeah.
All of the resolve.
Maybe the resistance rules are different.
I don't know.
Well, I'm going to follow this.
I'm going to say, you're going to take five stress.
Uh, this really bothers you.
You're really upset with having to, to say no to your friend.
Um, because if you guys remember one of the, uh, when you were back on the, uh, you're
going to flashback.
Uh, you're back in the, uh, on the lonely aisle with the, with Maggie and your wish had
been to be accepted by your friends and loved by your friends.
If you remember this, uh, troubles.
So this really, really hurts and really tugs on your heartstrings, but you are able to,
to, to put your foot down and you say, no, no, you do take a lot of stress.
Uh, squish.
You don't get a chance to kind of, uh, answer back to chuckles once he, well, chuckles.
You tell me you, how do you tell squish?
No.
Uh, well, I, yeah, I agree.
I, I, the stress and I just say squish.
I, I can't do that.
I'm sorry.
Uh, at that moment, once you've said that squish, you don't get a chance to respond because the
door to the staircase has blown open, not slammed open, not swung open.
Falls off of its hinges.
Uh, the captain is standing there at the top of the stairs.
He is beyond upset.
You guys have seen him mad.
You've seen him pissed.
You've seen him angry.
This is beyond.
Uh, with a snap of his finger, suddenly you guys feel the arms, ghostly arms on either side of you.
Uh, they take your arms, they take your legs.
The harp is ripped out of your hands, squish.
And it's passed along these ghostly fingers to the captain.
He has summoned his ghost crew.
Uh, and he has taken hold of the three of you.
And he looks at the three of you.
He, I don't care who or what or why, but there's only one thing we do to mutineers on this ship.
And that's toss them overboard.
Oh, shit.
And he, he yells to the crew.
You hear this ghostly just shout around you.
Beauty.
Um, squish, patches, troncles, tawny, and dee-dee.
The five of you are wrapped.
You're, you're grabbed from all angles.
And you are forced to the edge of the ship.
And you are forced one by one to the very end.
Patches, you're first up.
Anything to say?
Patches!
The captain says.
Anything to say before I toss you overboard one more time?
Yeah.
Screw you!
Your yokele playing sucks.
It always has.
Burn!
And you've got a weird thing for tussling air.
Uh, you don't get to make out the last sentence because you are shoved overboard.
Chuckles!
Uh, you are the next up.
Anything to say, you rat bastard?
I trusted you.
Uh, what about one more tussle just for old times' sake?
Uh, you are shoved overboard and you hear, ah!
Oh.
As you splash to the ground below, uh, squish, uh, you make eye contact with the captain.
And, uh, for a moment you think he's gonna relent and he's gonna see all of the efforts
that you've done to come and get the harp back.
But all he saw was you with his harp and he doesn't care anymore.
And he just pushes you off without a chance to say anything.
I didn't even get a last thing to say.
I didn't get to ever say anything!
Dude, he was so sad.
That was so sad to say a thing.
I was so excited.
He wanted to say something as you're pushed over.
That's what I say!
Oh.
I want my lawyer!
Uh, Tawny and Dee Dee are tossed as unceremoniously afterwards.
Um, as you guys are swimming in the ocean, you see this ghost ship suddenly come alive.
Uh, there are cannons.
There are, there, the rigging is pulled out.
Big sail takes, takes the boat.
Um, you see that this ghost crew is fast at work.
They lift up their swords.
You hear them scream, uh, and they go blasting straight through the armada.
They do not pass go.
They do not stop.
Uh, and suddenly there is in front of you this sort of like raging sea battle.
Uh, meanwhile, the five of you,
you are left drifting ashore.
Just bobbing in the ocean?
You're not very far from shore.
You can't see it.
And so the five of you start paddling and making your way to the teacher and shore.
Tiger, I just love because like the incredulous look on your face, like, wait a minute.
The three of us were doing all that work and this is actually a well-oiled machine that can blow through a fucking armada.
What the fuck?
What the hell were we doing?
I could have done that just at any time.
Once in all of your planning, did you say maybe we should just ask the captain to use his ghost trip?
Gross crew.
I think.
No.
He was just using us for free labor.
To attack the other ships.
What?
I brought it up to attack the other ships.
That's true.
You did bring that up.
And the bastard still threw me overboard.
Yeah.
He's not a very caring guy.
But, yes, you all are slowly drifting towards the shore as you watch this ship, this battle rage on.
And you can't quite tell who's winning or losing.
But considering there's only one kahuna wave and many of this armada, it seems to be going well for the kahuna.
Swim, lads.
You're not the boss of me out here.
There's no captain.
There's no captain of the ocean.
All right.
Just drown.
All right.
See you later.
No.
Juggles.
Doggy paddle.
I'm heartbroken.
I lost my captain and I lost my friends.
Doggy paddle.
I'm just going to draw.
No.
I'm right next to you.
Come on.
We stuck out together.
Let's go.
Doggy paddle.
Doggy?
I reluctantly doggy paddle.
Paddle.
Doggy paddle?
We're going to go.
We're going to kind of end it there.
But as you get closer, you see this castle looming ahead of you.
And this is Teacher Rose Castle, where you are shortly about to land.
Should we just wash up on the beach like a couple of starfish?
Yeah.
With Juggles and Tawny?
You wash up ashore.
What?
With Didi and Tawny?
Yeah.
I'm getting them out there.
There he is.
There they are.
He's my little mutineer.
Wait.
That's not the picture of Tawny, is it?
Oh, it is Tawny.
Yeah.
It's a Triple H.
Yeah.
Tawny got beat up.
Tawny's had a rough life.
Yeah.
Yes.
But you guys approach Castle Teacher Rose.
It's this many-storied kind of city castle that kind of gets larger and larger as you get
closer and closer.
And you notice there's a lot of buildings.
And it's just a massive unit.
It's not even, it's not a castle.
It's a city inside of a building.
So are we good?
I'm talking Squish.
Are we good?
Yeah.
Sorry about the whole harp-throwing thing, Squish, but, you know, the thing was evil.
So no hard feelings, right?
No harp feelings.
Oh, my God.
Bridgie, beat me to it.
Fucking beautiful.
Disgusting.
Well, I mean, seeing as how you don't know what I would have used it for.
Evil.
You don't know that.
You said you were evil.
I said I want to be evil.
You said the word evil.
I mean, come on.
I said I want to be evil.
Well, that's why he didn't.
That's why.
You weren't even there.
All right.
You're right.
You got me there.
No hard feelings, right?
We'll figure that out later.
Hail the drunk fort boys in the night they roam.
Solving wolves with fire and cruel.
With a clash and a crash and a twist of fate.
Explosions mark the hours never late.
You're on the Kahuna wave in the galley area, which you've made like a makeshift like homecoming prom, you know, so you got some balloons out.
Some punch, a really bad cake.
No, not a bad cake.
It's a bacon, Alaska or something beautiful.
Yeah.
Right.
But it's like a, you know, it's a pretty, you know, it's a cake.
And Patches, you're standing there in your finest suit.
And there comes Neelix down the stairs in his most beautiful dress.
I'm so proud of her.
Neelix has finally come into his or her own.
Their own.
Oh, their own.
Oh.
Is Neelix, does Neelix know about this?
I thought we were just like standing around in our Sunday best.
We're standing all around the bottle and we're about, we're about to ask him out of the bottle and welcome him into, you know, coming out.
Yes.
Into adulthood.
Coming out of the bottle party.
Yes.
And he's completely unaware.
It's like a surprise coming out party.
Oh, my God.
Jesus Christ, I've never been more proud of them.
Neelix.
That's how you knew.
That's how you knew that he wanted to be called Neelix now.
I imagine she's wearing like just a.
Belle of the ball kind of dress, like, you know,
He's reused Marie Antoinette dress.
Yeah, he just keeps reusing that.
He just looks like Bugs Bunny.
He just says it's a wig.
What's funny, guys, is that like Neelix, like in my head, he looks like Duckworth, which is Scrooge McDuck's butler.
So I just keep imagining him in a fucking Marie Antoinette dress.
We got to try to get an AI to do this because it's in my head and it's driving me mad.
And I'm so happy for him.